[India] Love sought is good, but given unsought better [July MP | Kestutis]

The Karsha Gustor Festival was better than she had imagined it to be. All of the colors, the bursts of music and chants, the synchronized movements the performers executed harmoniously, the skillfully crafted props, and the breathtakingly beautiful traditional clothing of the land swarmed around Valda. Her head spun as she tried to focus on everything going on around her. Everything was so beautiful and so different, she just couldn't peel her eyes away from the spectacular show going on. The redhead had happily helped herself to the street food and even jumped up on stage when volunteers were asked to come up and learn a dance before performing it. She and others who had joined the musicians and dancers were taught within a few minutes. The crowd was too, but being on stage, she was able to try performing it in front of others. Valda was even doing all she could to learn as much of the languages spoken in the local area as she could while she was here. Secretly though, Valda was grateful she was of age to use magic. This way, she could use a translating charm to help her be better understood by others not of her native Russian tongue. Coming to India was a wonderful idea! The culture here was unlike anything Valda had ever experienced. The festival, had in a way, reminded her of the harvest festival in Scoarta she got to participate in.

Thinking back to the ritual she had been a part of over winter made her feel a little homesick. It was true, Valda wasn't from Scoarta, but her boyfriend was. Unfortunately for her, @Gio Gambino was nowhere to be found. He was back at his home, discussing with his mother about the possibility of coming to Eruda, Valda's home, to spend the summer with her. He had a lot of responsibilities in his homeland, that arrangements for him to visit her were making things a little more difficult than she had hoped. He had never been one for big crowds and loud music though. She couldn't help but wonder if he had come, if he would have been miserable the entire time. Of course, she would have gone out of her way to help him be comfortable in a strange land, but she wondered if he'd even have fun at such an elaborate event such as this. He was a man of habit and order. Though she didn't expect he'd enjoy himself too much at the Karsha Gustor Festival, she still missed him greatly and wished he had come so she could share this time with him and make memories with him here. Since he hadn't come and Valda was in this land all alone, she planned to bring him back a souvenir from her travels.

Being only eighteen and so far from home, it was all a tad overwhelming. It served as wonderful distraction however, and kept her mind and body busy with all that was going on so that she wouldn't think about being home in the house that no longer had residents living in it except her. She was grateful for the break to not think about the emptiness that would be awaiting her since her mother had passed in Christmas.

As the day grew on, Valda found herself quickly tiring. Her energy had been exerted in her involving herself as much as she possibly could in the festivities. Looking up at the sun over head, she could tell that evening was approaching. She wished to remain with the crowds and enjoy all there was, but she knew she needed to take a break and be sure she stayed hydrated as well as fed herself so that she could enjoy what wonders awaited once the sun had set and the moon and stars shone brightly overhead. She found herself reluctantly separating herself from a rooftop full of spectators and guests who were enjoying themselves as they watched the performances below them when she made her way to the nearest restaurant. She made sure she could still capture all the action, but view from afar so that she wasn't squished and shoved around by the plethora of bodies.

She adjusted the sari she had purchased for herself as she entered through the doorway. The teal fabric contrasted from her fiery red hair, which only made her stand out more in India. It was clear that Valda Pavlycheva was not a native. She had come with no friends, nor did she know of anyone from school who would be attending the festival. There wasn't a single familiar face around her. Even if she had spotted @Aphrodisia Xydakis , she would have been grateful to have known someone in this land of color and celebration. Over the tops of the heads of many customers and through the crevices between many guests, Valda managed to spot something that gave her a spark of hope. A little tuft of hair about the same red as hers. Immediately, she was drawn to it. The golden metallic bracelets and anklets that she wore clanked together as she made her way closer, holding the fabric of her dress close to keep it from getting stepped on.

"Kestutis!" She couldn't help the exclamation that came from her when she was soon able to recognize his face. Valda drew closer to him until she came to stand right beside him, being very close due to the numerous bodies within the building providing her with very little space. "Am I glad to see you! I was starting to think I was the only one from school who came. Have you seen anyone else?" She looked about them at the multitude that swarmed around them while she tucked her hair behind her ear, but she didn't wait for him to reply when she turned her attention back to him and proceeded with her questions. "What are you doing here? Have you been enjoying yourself?" The scene was oddly familiar. It had reminded her about the time when she approached him to be keeper for the time. He seemed to be a little distant from all that was going on around him. Valda had intruded his space and interrupted thoughts. She hoped he wouldn't be in such a foul mood like he was last time though. In a setting such as this, she saw no reason for him to be hostile and upset with her for coming to speak with him.



@Axel @Kęstutis Astrauskas

Why was he here? This wasn’t his scene it wasn’t even his type of event to go to yet here he was getting showered by artists with glitter. Why did his mother force him to come here? He could understand her need for him to experience more culture and the need to bond with him more since they had issues in the past, but this wasn’t something he would have picked. It was too colorful and cheery for Kes’ tastes she even forced him into wearing some of the traditional attire for the culture. It wasn’t hideous or anything, but Kes just preferred his normal attire and just felt overall uncomfortable in the outfit. “When I get home I’m hiding this away forever,” He said to himself as he walked the streets trying to push his way through the crowd of wizards and witches. Getting away from his mother was quite easy as she tasted some of the wears from a vendor on the other side of the festival. Maybe if he was lucky he could find one of the portkeys and escape back to his home.

That’s when he heard the familiar timber. “Oh no,” said with dread as he stopped his movements. Had she followed him like the stray puppy she was? Why was she such a sore in his side? Sure she saved him in the quidditch match from being hit by a bludger, but it felt as if she was trying to cling to him for reasons he didn’t know. Did she want something from him or was she simply trying to annoy the living daylights out of him? He was grateful that they were able to win the match together, but he felt he didn’t do much in the match as he simply saved one goal and then another he let in because he wasn’t paying attention. The rest of the match was a blur as it was certainly a weird match to begin with. It was if no one on the professor’s team had really any idea of how to play it was both an embarrassment to them and an insult to the students who tried so hard to have a thrilling game.

When he turned around he saw her in her own outfit to match the culture. Her hair was a brilliant red that, like Kes’ own hair, stood out in the crowd of people. So this is how she found him because he couldn’t blend in with his surroundings. Kes decided to make a mental note to possibly dye or change the color of his hair one day maybe then he could hide away from this puppy of a person. Still he was now in this position so he sighed as she got a little too close for comfort though not to a fault of her own as they were in a crowd. So she wasn’t looking for him in particular instead she just wanted to see a familiar face and why he was here. He arched his eyebrows and questioned, “What about Gio I’m sure he is here somewhere?” He had no clue where he was nor did he fully care, but he figured this was probably whom she would most likely be looking for. “I was dragged her by my mother I would rather be back home in Lithuania if I had a choice, but as you can see my hand has been forced,” He said with a sigh as he shook his head and then pulled on his clothes in discomfort. “I even have to wear this stupid what did she call it? A Kurta? Honestly why couldn’t I just wear my normal wear. Even our school robes would have been much more favorable than this attire.”

He continued, “Also does it look like I’m enjoying myself here?” He pushed his left hand through his hair in frustration as he looked around as the people pushing past them. “I mean I never cared for groups of people so why must I suffer through this hell? This is more your scene than mine anyways!” Kes stomped the ground, “Dammnit can’t I ever just be fully left alone?” He looked around at the people and was given a few harsh glares as he looked back at Valda. He gave an audible sigh before adding, “Sorry, I’m just not the best person in crowds.” He gave a short growl as this one person looked like they were going to interfere with their conversation. They left and continued on their way, but Kes had to get out of this crowd now. He went to grab Valda’s hand and said, “Follow me I need out of this crowd we can continue this conversation with less people.” Whether she let him grab her hand or not he ran off towards a secluded area that did get some people, but for the most part was a bit more quiet than the other places and he found someplace to sit. He waited for Valda to appear and say something while he took a second to collect his thoughts.

She only shrugged at his question. "I wish he was. He couldn't come," she said disappointedly. "He's busy back home, but he's going to come visit me when I go home though!" She couldn't wait to go home. Talking about Gio reminded her that she needed to get a souvenir for him before the festival was over. It wasn't that she had forgotten about bringing home a trinket. Valda just hadn't found the perfect one. She'd go looking for one later.

As her friend took the time to answer her questions, she gave him her attention. Why had she assumed his attitude about being in India wouldn't be something to be weary of? His open distaste made her feel guilty for having interupted his time alone once again. She had wanted to comment about how his outfit looked good on him, despite his opinion on it, but instead decided to keep it to herself. She frowned more as he continued on. He really didn't know much about her. Then again, she didn't either. His mood was changing drastically fast so that shr could see just how irrotated he was. At his swearing and outburst, Valda grew uncomfortable. If he wanted to be alone, she was prepared to apologize and leave. Her heart dropped in her chest. She felt anxious like a young child anticipating a punishment for having done something wrong. Was she really that much of a bother to him?

Kestutis had a lot more to say than she thought he did, but she was relieved. It was all so quick and sudden, but she had caught his apology before he pulled her out the door and ran down the street.

Somewhere through the rush and blur of the crowd around them, his grip on her hand had slipped and she found herself colliding with someone who quickly shouted at her. Their accent was hard and chalky, but Valda wasn't sure where it was from or try to make out what they had said to her. She barely got an apology out, but she pushed forward through the crowd. Her eyes were locked on the red hair much like her own.

Just as she emerged from the sardine-packed people, she watched him turn around a corner. Her eye was also caught by a street vendor between her and that spot. Valda decided to listen to her instincts and made for the vendor.

Within a few short minutes, she rounded the corner Kes had taken. She sighed softly when she spotted him secluded from everyone else. Right now, she was getting mixed signals about just what he wanted. He didn't like big crowds and wanted his space, but he had also pulled her along rather than leave her behind when hr made his escape. She was weary as she approached him, careful to not upset him once more. "Here. I thought you might like something to cool you down. The climate is much warmer than Durmstrang." She placed a disposable tray beside him. In it were small fried doughy balls with a sweet minty taste to them.

The Russian tucked her hair behind her ear as she sat beside him, but was careful to leave a little mroe than a foot between them so she wasn't too close. Instead of speaking right away, she plopped a doughy ball of her own into her mouth and chewed. She sat cross legged on the ledge she and Kestutis had perched themselves on. Her dress was pulled over her legs so she wasn't revealing to the public while the tray rested on her lap. "I'm sorry if I made you upset," she said as she swallowed. "And if I bother you too much. I got really excited seeing you here." Another ball was picked up. She held it between her fingers and turned it over in the air as if she were trying to decide which direction she should eat it from. "You look good in your Kurta too. I think the colors suit you well." She glanced over at him as she raised the treat to her lips. "Besides not enjoying yourself and being upset that you were forced to come here, are you alright? You seem to be a lot more upset than your usualself I've seen," she said as she bit the ball in half.

It must have been nice to have someone who you cared for. Kes wouldn’t say it out loud nor would he realize he ever felt this way, but he was a bit jealous of Valda. He was always alone and never had anyone really he as truly close to at least not on a romantic level. It certainly would prove, at the bare minimum, a nice change of pace for the brash child that existed in the heart of Kes. Who knows maybe if he did find someone to fall for and them in turn he could even grow as a person and not be so bitter to the world and his friends. Still he felt bad for Valda as she wouldn’t be with the one whom she was obviously infatuated with. He knew what it was like to be left alone and deserted by a loved one and it was an unpleasant feeling. He couldn’t articulate his words that he knew how she felt but he would stare in her eyes hoping that maybe she would understand that underneath his coarse exterior he did know how she felt to some degree.

He didn’t have much time to reflect on the damage he was doing to Valda though as he began his race away from the people to a secluded place. He wasn’t thinking rationally as he wanted to get away from both Valda and the crowd, but he couldn’t just leave her to be hurt from his hateful words. Kes felt his mind had grown cloudy and stormy with thoughts of anger, fear, resentment, jealously, rage, frustration, insecurities, and loneliness fueled his unwarranted actions to someone he would like to one day at least call a friend. He found a ledge and lowered his head covering his face with shadow. His hands were each holding one of his elbows in a sort of scared and dejected stance as he sat. Kes was trying to suppress his array of emotions from escaping. He needed control and he needed space, but over all he needed out of his own headspace. He made a bad decision on trying to escape to a place where he could be alone. He half wished Valda was there with him now, but he lost his grip on her while he was in flight away from the onlookers and tourists. “She probably left to enjoy herself some more,” he solemnly said to himself.

He heard footsteps come his way a few minutes later though and he was about to burst out for the person to leave him alone when he heard her voice. She didn’t abandon him like everyone would most likely do so. Was she really this nice of a person or was she pitying him? It’s not like he deserved either he was such a miserable sad excuse for a student and human being. She placed a ray beside him and he angled his eyes toward them keeping his face shadowed by the tilt of his head. Valda had brought him some food and Kes felt very conflicted by this. Was she trying to poison him? Did she want something and was bribing him? Was she really the type of person who would give someone a gift after being treated so horribly to? His mind was racing again that he let out an audible groan to her. What did he do to deserve such nicety from someone? Valda didn’t deserve to be mistreated like he was doing to her. She should be with Gio instead of an ungrateful brat like him.

He couldn’t speak though as he felt every word he would say to her would just come off as wrong or insulting for her. It would be better if he stayed silent, but her words were like a knife to his stomach. It was true he didn’t much care for her prying nature and the fact she always seemed like this incredible ball of sunshine to everyone, but it didn’t mean he wanted to hurt her and cause her to burn out. Kes still had some shred of dignity in his heart to keep those whom were innocent away from the trifles of darkness. Yet he couldn’t apologize. He couldn’t bring himself to take his actions and hold himself responsible for them he was just too prideful for that. He wouldn’t call himself perfect by any means of the word, but he wouldn’t say he was wrong when he was. Calling him stubborn might have been a more descriptive term for his attitude. Still he needed to make Valda at least feel not as uncomfortable and let her know he didn’t want to be mean to her. He took a deep breath and let it out in a long sigh with his head still down and his eyes closed. He didn’t take one of the panipuri’s as he felt if he did he was using the girl just to get something from her and he didn’t feel right about it. He instead moved his hands up to his face and bent forward more and through his hands he muffled, “it’s nothing.”

This wasn’t true as it was everything. The people, the self-hate, the stress, the forced adventures, the pressures of both his home life and what the ministry has put his family though was finally rearing its ugly head to him. He was always able to keep his own fears and doubts away from people and despite not being the nicest of people he was able to keep his frustration levels at a decent rate. Valda just unluckily got to him when his fuse was short and he just exploded. It wasn’t her fault at all and he felt extremely guilty about it. He sat there for a few more minutes in silence trying to think of what to say. He probably looked quite silly with his hands on his face like they were. Eventually he spoke in muffled hushed tones, “I’m…just…lost.” His brain was in full blown circuit mode right now and he couldn’t comprehend his own thoughts. Nothing felt right and nothing felt wrong either. He couldn’t place anything in words to explain to the poor girl his actions as he didn’t know them either. “What am I doing?” he said to himself in question for Valda to hear. “What’s the point of trying anymore if all I do is push everyone away?” Kes sighed as he continued, “I would just be better if I left wouldn’t it? Just disappear from the world. It’s not like anyone would miss me.” He could feel soft tears being to form in his eyes as he spoke. No he was being too vulnerable right now he needed to bounce back to his normal self.

Kes shook his head violently and faced Valda whom was a bit farther away than he thought she was. He attempted to put on a small that came off as a half scowl half grin. He wanted to quickly change the subject away from himself and his inner demons so he asked, “You going to try out for the team next year?” It was about quidditch the thing that originally had them confront each other as it was something they would have a common bond over. He hoped she would take the bait trying to keep his forced smile on being as friendly as he could possibly be to hide his true feelings with an armor of smiles. That’s why she liked after all right, smiles and happiness?

Th-thump.

Her chest ached as she paid him more mind than her food. She felt her heart beat heavily before it tightened to cause her pain. His groans and sobbing spoke volumes to her heart. They were personal. Emotional. Real. Relatable. With the minimum words he spoke, she connected to it all so personally. Her eyes rested on him. Every instinct in her body was crying out for her to reach out and place a comforting hand on his shoulder, rub his back for a few moments, or to even pull him into a strong embrace. Something had broken him. She wasn't sure what it was or how long ago it happened, but his words brought tears to her eyes. She refrained herself from reaching out to touch him and instead wiped at her eyes. Seeing how he was pushed away all the distractions she had given herself in her mind. Everything she'd been feeling for months, maybe even more than she dared to admit, she saw in Kęstutis.

She wasn't as surprised at his sudden change in topic now than his earlier outburst. Her hands rested in her lap after having set her tray of food aside. She sniffed loudly and shook her head at his question. "Quidditch is not for me," she looked at him with her red eyes. She'd only hoped he didn't notice she had started to cry at seeing him. "Honestly, you should go for it. You'd be in some more limelight next season than you got at our last game." She smirked a little as a soft laugh escaped her. "You'd get to play with Lev!" She jestfully remarked in a sing-song manner.

Valda didn't keep the smile for too long. Her head nodded towards his own food. "Eat something. It's important to keep up your energy. It's crucial to do so when you feel less motivated to do it... That's what my mother used to say to me at least. She got sick, you know? When she was in a better state, she'd always make me promise to make her eat when she was at her worst." The sash she wore was being twisted between her fingers. "You know, you're not going to do anyone any good if you just disappeared? There's only three of us who remember her. Our family friend. Lev. And me." She counted the people off on her fingers. "She had no other friends or family. Just us. Just before Christmas this past year, she disappeared. I don't know if she ever thought about what her absence would do to us, but she hurt us. We missed her then as we do now. It took away a big piece of me when I learned." She looked away and wiped at her eyes again with a louder sniff. "I miss her more and more each day. I feel so little without her here. Even before she passed though, I found myself feeling insignificant and worthless. At least when she was around, I had some purpose. Now, the thought that I'm not important or good enough for anything creeps into my mind time and time again."

She leaned back on her hands to prop her up. "As terrible as it is, there's been some good from it. I've made some lovely friends. I've learned to stand on my own two feet, even though I'm knocked down repeatedly. I get back up. I've been able to travel! I never dared to with mama being sick all the time. India is the real first place I've gotten to be a tourist in. Not only that, but I've met some interesting people who I hope to be friends with." Valda couldn't help herself when she leaned over and nudged his side with her elbow, hoping it would lighten the mood in some way and maybe even successfully coax out a genuine smile from him. She hoped he was catching on that she wanted to be his friend. "You're much more to people than you think you are. You've got a lot of potential in you too. You just have to tap into it."

A heavy sigh came from her, shown with the deep rise and fall of her chest. Her brown eyes looked back at Kes as she smiled at him. "So...quidditch? You going to try out for it? We can talk about that or absolutely anything else. I'm curious though if you're going to try out for the team."

She was quiet now too and this worried Kes a bit. Did he really say something wrong? Was his words that damaging to people or was it just the fact the two shared another trait with each other? Did the two of them connect more than they realized or was it just Kes being stubborn about how he appeared to the world he refused to see the similarities? It’s not like they talked very often and it’s not like he ever truly ventured out to people to get to know them either. His relationship with Lev was one of shared mutual interests and even then it’s not like the two boys were fairly close to each other. Was Kes really that bad at keeping friends that he would push them away so hard he was always alone? Was he such a screw up that he would never amount to anything and he would really live a life of isolation and solitude cause he couldn’t maintain friendships and connections? It was nerve wrecking thinking about all this that Kes couldn’t help and feel broken and defeated. He felt hollow and empty inside.

Then she sniffed and things felt real and raw. He really was pushing people away and he could without seeing her face feel as if she was crying. He had hurt her heart and now he should pay the price. He half expected her to either hit him or run away yet she spoke instead. He felt surprise and amazement that she didn’t retaliate or abandon him. Was she really this pure of a person? Should she even be here around him where his darkness could spread and infect her light like a plague? She was even not going to be a part of the quidditch team which meant they probably wouldn’t be seeing each other as much which made him feel both relieved and sad at the same time. He was happy because he could focus on himself and not be there to cause her harm with his atrocious façade of an attitude, but saddened because she was beginning to feel like his first true friend. Kes began to wonder had he even had friends to begin with or were they all just acquaintances? He didn’t want to give up on her just yet even if it meant doing things he might not like himself. “You did wonderfully though,” Kes said in response to her saying she probably wouldn’t be. His face was no longer in his hands as he looked at her trying to cheer her up. She needed to know that she was the only reason he was able to even play in the first place. Sure he knew about her issues with floating above the pitch, but she was beginning to mean something to him and he needed her as a security blanket to keep his emotions in check.

Then she mentioned Lev and his face began downtrodden. Kes began to question the friendship the two of them had now. Had they really been friends all these years? He couldn’t remember much time spent with the other guy nor could he remember any true found memories. It was almost as if the two were just there near each other all the time. Was it all because of coincidence or was it for another reason? Did Kes simply find himself wandering towards Lev for friendship or more? No he wouldn’t believe it they were just similar guys who held similar interests. There was no way there was anything more than that and Kes refused to believe otherwise. Maybe that would be a reason not to join the team next year as if he had to guess Lev would definitely be on the team. “I..don’t know,” he said in a shallow voice as he looked back down to the ground.

She began to critique him and basically forced him with her words to eat. He took one as she talked and took a bite into the item not really tasting anything as he paid more attention to the words coming out of her mouth. She had a story and one that wasn’t a very bright one at that. Her mother had passed leaving her with a hole in her heart. Kes felt anger and sorrow in his heart as he felt no one should have done such harsh things to someone so filled with light. Still he couldn’t pry himself from the last of her words describing herself as unimportant or useless. He saw himself reflected in her for a second there and couldn’t handle it himself he turned away from her trying to hide his own face more. He knew if she saw his eyes she would bare deep into his heart and would see the burning fire of hate for her mother. Yet she still seemed to linger on the idea of her mother to some extent and he could understand that aspect of her state. Kes didn’t want to impose on her now as she was feeling vulnerable now herself which now made them both in a similar state.

Before Kes could even respond though Valda put herself back into her warm self. He felt even more useless in this quick moment though as it meant she was able to fix herself while he needed the help of others to even remotely feel better. Was there something wrong with him? He began to wonder if, despite what she said, he really should just up and leave and never return. It’s not like he had many friends and she certainly would have other people to distract her from his absence if he did. His own mother would be able to concentrate on her work and it’s not like his father was ever there anyways. It wouldn’t be hard for him to just move to another country and try and start his life anew right? It could be an option for him, but he would need to prepare first before he would even attempt to do such a thing.

Friends? That had a nice ring to it that’s for sure. Kes couldn’t help but smile softly to himself when Valda nudged his elbow. He felt a warmness in the pit of his stomach now though as she complimented him. Is this what a healthy friendship was like or was she just able to spread her sunshine to people so easily because it came naturally to her? Though he had to disagree with her about him having potential he still felt it was nice to be supported as such. She then turned the conversation back to quidditch and he became conflicted. He did enjoy the fact he was able to play even if he wasn’t all that good during the exhibition match. So it would be a nice distraction from his everyday routine and prove to be an entertaining one too. She gave her a coy smile before responding with, “Only if you join me.” He looked forward towards the street of people whom were still wandering around the town enjoying the festivities. “Would be nice to see a familiar face on the field,” Kes said warmly. Though there probably would be a few familiar faces he meant this as more of a trusting face, someone whom he could lean on if things go wrong. “If all else fails I guess I could try the dueling team,” he added nonchalantly. He looked back at Valda and asked, “What about you?”

To see him begin to cheer up, she couldn't help but smile more. The happier mood setting between them was refreshing though she hoped he would be able to take away something from her story of her mother. He meant something. If she knew him a little bit more, she'd offer him a list of all the great things he could do and the noble atteibutes he had about him. She had a few already come to mind but she held her tongue for the time being.

"I appreciate your compliment, but we both saw what happened to me on that field. I was almost crushed! I didn't have the guts to try to turn it around. Another second and I would have been turned to jelly!" She joked as she tucked her hair behind her ear. "You don't need me to join the team for you to do it. If I do join, I'm not just afraid of falling off my broom, but I fear I'll loose my head, or be swallowed up by a disappearing cloak!" Thinking about the events of the end of the year game sent a shiver down her spine. She continuously checked the news for any updates that perhaps their Nautical Magic professor would be found.

She shrugged at his question. What about her? She didn't quite understand what he was asking. Valda only assumed he was inquiring about her plans for next year. "You know, Dueling Club isn't too bad. I was in it this last year. If I do join a club next term, it would probably be that one. I'm not too good with magic. It's been getting better though."

Valda stood, but not to leave the spot. She simply adjusted her dress before she resumed her seat again, closing some of the distance between she and him. Things between them were starting to look a little better than what she had first thought of him since his mannerisms had taken a surprising turn earlier. "What do you mean about 'What about me'? I could give you a better answer than just dueling club. Is there something in particular you want to know about me?" Though she had a much lighter attitude now, she still carried herself as if there were a great weight on her chest. She was slumped and her shoulders sagged, but her face mirrored some happiness. Talking about her mom had brought her down much more than she anticipated. Her guard was down around him though and she didn't feel out of place being so trodden down around him. It was true, she was often full of sunshine and happiness, but it was simply a mask to hide her saddness. It was how she demonstrated that she was strong. She was only living how her mother had taught her, even through her worst of times.

She was smiling again that was a good thing right? Kes began to wonder about Valda’s smiles. Were they genuine or were they false? He hadn’t paid much attention to her before these few times they talked and he always assumed the smiles were real, but now he was unsure. She wasn’t the ray of sunshine he thought she might have been as he now uncovered her own darkness. He began to wonder how long she had been like this and how he didn’t see it before. Was he that blind to people’s afflictions or emotions? Was he really that dense? Kes hated himself for this now and it would be another item to add to his list of dislikes for himself. He really was pathetic with how little he knew of people and how little he noticed things. It only made him despise himself even more.

He decided to take a page from Valda’s book and try and hide his own darkness with smiles. It worked for her all these years so why not him? He gave her another smile in response to her quidditch skills and comment about the disappearing cloak. “You didn’t though and if you did I’m sure the rest of us would have tried to save you somehow,” he said with a slight laugh. Though he knew the majority of the people on the team had been a little harsh and intense at times they were team players after all. They wouldn’t let someone fail without some form of support for the girl. He did still agree that maybe she wouldn’t have been the best choice of captaincy of the team though. “if anything I could always use the moral support to join if you would at least join me,” Kes said this almost a bit shyly before adding, “You don’t have to of course.” He honestly felt he wouldn’t be able to try-out without her help. She had this ability to bring out the better apart of himself and if he really wanted to be on the team he would need her support for it. It mattered not if she believed it or not, but it would also be another nice reason to hang out with her once more at least.

Now she was questioning his question about her. How was he to put that he wanted to know more about her? He didn’t want to ask it plainly as it would feel weird for him to care enough about someone to learn more most of the time he just learned by proximity or by their actions and not by words. He turned his face back down towards his knees and whispered, “please don’t make me say it.” He didn’t have the courage to ask the question he wanted to ask. Maybe it was weird of him to feel this way, but he didn’t know how to act around someone who could be a true friend. Sure he had some type of friends he could laugh with and joke around with, but a friend he could be vulnerable with that was a new experience. He wasn’t sure how to approach this friendship and it was awkward to him to try. He could only hope that Valda would understand this about him.

"We'll just have to see what the future holds. I may try out. If anything, I could always come to try outs and watch from the stands." She picked up one of her Panipuris and plopped it into her mouth. She allowed the treat to sit in her mouth for a few moments as she savored the taste of it before she continued eating it. A quick glance at her tray showed the numbers of the doughy balls were quickly diminishing. She enjoyed them so much, Valda was disappointed to see she was going through them so quickly. This was a treat she wanted to know how to make so she could eat it any time she wanted while at home.

Her eyebrows furrowed together at his statement. "Come on," she pushed from him. Valda hadn't picked up on any signals from him that Kes was uncomfortable or ashamed of having the question he refused to ask. His actions and hushed tones told her he was just shy, a personality she hadn't picked up on when she invited him to be keeper for their game. That interaction was much different  Now, as they talked with each other some more, she started to notice that his brash and cold exterior had been his way of defense to hide his true emotions and feelings.

"What is it? What did you mean? I'm pretty certain we've been open about some things already today. I tend to give a pretty forward answer no matter what question is asked. If you have something on your mind, then just say it as it is. I've learned that's the best way to communicate things is just by being honest." This was true. Many times, it'd done her good, depending on the situations. The only time she ever sae it have a bad affect was when she and Gio had fought over Christmas break.

Valda wasn't certain as to what he could ask, but she was fully prepared to answer it honestly. It seemed to already be a roller coaster of emotions for them since she approached him in the crowd, but she was enjoying the time they were spending to get to know each other better. It was refreshing to have someone she could speak to in her native tongue. To have someone stand out in the crowd just as much as she did with copper-red hair, a plethora of freckles, and a fair complexion. To have a familiar face-someone she could connect with, talk about subjects they had similarities in, and to talk about future plans at school with a full knowledge and interest as to what they were saying-she loved it. It helped her not be too worried and frazzled with being away from home, from the people she cared about most. Now, away from the burdens of school and just enjoying life, she and Kes were able to bump into each other at thia grand festival and spend some time gettinf to know each other without the stress and formalities of school. It was a much more casual setting. Because of this, she believed it made them being so vulnerable with each other easier in a very natural, realistic way.

“Why did you choose me of all people?” Kes asked ashamed. If he was honest he was probably the last person he would have approached if he was in her shoes yet here she was hanging around him and giving him so much attention. Why was she so open? What made her the person she was and why would she approach someone so spiteful so hateful and so arrogant such as him? It was a phenomenon he needed answers for, but he didn’t want to hurt her by being too blunt. He needed finesse which wasn’t something he was able to do in most conversations. Sure with magic and pranks it came easy to him, but on a social level he had issues filtering himself.  How was one to let someone past the walls or how was one to pull the walls down after having them up for so long? It wasn’t a pleasant feeling for Kes, but it was also refreshing at the same time. It was confusing for the boy how positive and negative he felt at the same time. He could feel a tinge of a headache approach him as his thoughts would swell.

She spoke of honesty between friends and how they held the key to relationships and this made Kes feel down. “Honesty huh?” he asked gloomily. It wasn’t something he was native to what with all the lies that had been told his way and thrusted into his life. The lies the ministry had forced down upon their family and lies they had to say just to stay afloat. It was like they were being choked with pressure constantly over the years and yet despite them having the freedom of not being watched anymore the scars a bruises still lingered in their hearts.

He sighed quite forcibly as he decided to speak some more. “How can one be honest in a world full of lies and deception?” He leaned back and looked up at the sky in frustration. The world was such a vile place and yet here the two of them were at a festival as if nothing had happened and the world was at peace. He decided to go on a sort of rant and continued with, “We barely survived the wrath of a crazed Headmistress and the hatred of another school. A war in another country caused one of our ex headmasters to be killed and even a student was killed one year. If that isn’t a sign to say the world is a place of corruption and deceit I don’t know what is.” He pulled his legs up to him and crossed his arms around his knees. He placed his chin on his arms and whispered, “The world is full of such darkness and hate what’s the point in trying anymore?” Kes felt insecure about how he viewed the world and how much he hated it, but he needed this. He needed to get this off his chest and express himself as it wasn’t something he could do at home. His mother was always working trying to keep them from being poor while still trying to keep her own reputation decent at the ministry. While he barely skidded by in school not showing any true proficiency in any class work or studies. He felt worthless and pathetic that he had to hide himself from most people by acting cool and tough just so he would fit in with her peers.

He shook his head trying to press the thoughts away and changed the subject. “So…how are things with you and your father after the,” he paused choosing his words carefully before adding, “Incident.” He looked at Valda hoping she would answer his question and maybe they could lighten their subject of talk or at the very least deflect it away from him and his own troubles. Kes didn’t much care for talking about himself and even if it meant opening old wounds in Valda’s heart it would be better than letting his own inner demons out.

His question had taken her back. Why she chose him? Another question of confusion. She wasn't quite sure what he implied, but she sat quietly and listened to all he had to say. Her mind had immediately raced to the moment when she had asked him to play as keeper for the quidditch game they had been talking about earlier. That incident was going to be what she referenced in her response to his question. Another part of her though caused her to second guess herself and she wondered if he meant why she had approached him here, in India. Out of a crowd of thousands, she had gone up to him. She decided to give him an answer that would suffice for both of those incidents. If he wanted her to be more specific, he could always ask and she would always answer.

She answered honestly, "I don't know much about you, this is true, but I've found we have this connection when I started talking to you. I like it. We each have our similarities, and I think we have a few that helps us communicate easier with each other than our other friends and acquaintances. I chose you because I've always wanted to get to know you. I'm not much of a social butterfly, though I know it doesn't seem that way, and I've always seen you around school. I didn't start talking to people until I was in your year-I think. It was about my fifth or sixth year. Lev had been the one I really got talking to and he introduced me to his friends, but I never said much to them. This may sound super cliche and I hope you don't take this the wrong way, but I see a lot of me in you. It's hard to describe..." Her voice trailed off as her gaze left him and looked down at a weed pushing it's way through the cobblestone cracks beneath their feet. "I guess the shorter version of that is I think you're a pretty cool guy and I want to be your friend. There's a lot to still learn about you, but I like you as a friend." She ended with a shrug and glanced back at him. Valda wasn't sure what else she could say. Hopefully, she wasn't coming off as flirtatious or was scaring him off at the mention of friends. She'd never really known how to say things. That was an apparent fault of her own: one she had been working to improve.

Her eyes studied him and his actions intensely as he continued on. She wanted to comment on it, but he had changed the subject all too quickly for her. She'd wanted to tell him that it was worth trying. Her whole life had been nothing but darkness. There were moments when Valda didn't think her mom would make it through the night. At a young age, she'd been introduced to a cruel world of selfishness and pride. The only one who reached out to her family and decided to help them in any way he could was her only father-figure, a family friend. No one else would take pity on a young girl who was so hungry, she had to steal to eat before she met @Aleksandr Kozlov . Even at school, there were people who were heartless and unforgiving. She agreed with him. The world was full of darkness and hate. Her theory though was that this unforgiving space could be overpowered if one was a little optimist. If they looked for rainbows on a rainy day. If they learned to dance in the rain. If they stood tall amongst all their adversaries. If they constantly tried to look at the bright side, even if there seemed to be none. It never seemed like much, but she believed in these things because of her mother. Her mother had always taught her to smile. It was fine and normal to be upset and sad, but if one wallowed in their despair, it would eat them up. Being cheerful and bright was how she was taught to overcome it. It got her this far. She was reminded of a parable she had been taught too. One's own happiness was like a candle flickering. You had to take careful care of it so it didn't go out. That brightness could be shared with others if they just held out their own metaphorical candles and allowed her to light them. It wouldn't do much, but having one extra light would make it just a little brighter and easier to see through all of the lies, deception, misery, hatred, and despair that was all too present all around them.

Kes didn't appear to be in much of a mood for having Valda share some hopeful story she'd grown up with so she kept it to herself. One day though, she planned to tell him this little story of the candlelight. It was simple, but it had always moved Valda when she was at her worst.

If there was one word Valda would use to describe the person sitting beside her, it would be 'inquisitive'. He was always ready with a new question about her and wasn't holding back. She didn't mind it one bit, but she was realizing that a lot of the questions were kind of personal. They weren't too unsettling. They just made her feel a little uncomfortable. "I don't have a father," she answered after having bit her bottom lip and tucking her hands under her legs. "I did, once. He died when I was young. At least, that's what mama said about him. We don't believe he ran away to be with someone else. He never packed a bag or was out on suspicious business trips. He was a merchant after all. After a few months with no word back from him, mama assumed he was dead. I think her getting an official letter from the company he worked for about his many absences is what really told her he had died. We don't know where his body is or what happened to him. It's alright though. I don't remember much about him." There was an audible sigh that came from her as her ankles crossed one another. "I'm an orphan, you see? I'm 18 now so legally I can be on my own. I wish papa was around though. It would've made this whole time with mama being sick a lot easier to cope with I think. They were in love. Nothing could prove otherwise. Neither of them are here with me, but I like to think they're with each other at least. Death has always been an obscure concept for me. I think if I knew what happens when we die, I might be able to handle this all just a little easier."

She mimicked his earlier actions of leaning back and looking up at the sky. It was so blue and peaceful, the corner of her lips involuntarily twitched into a crooked smile. When the weather was sunny with clear skies, she always felt a little better. "I'm not entirely alone though. I've got friends. There's even an old family friend who I really see as my father. He was close friends with my mom while I was growing up. There's been a lot between us." Most of it was good. If she were to answer his question though in regards to Aleksandr Kozlov, she'd have to tell him how they hadn't been all too close when her mom died. Valda was grateful he had let her live with him, but being so close to home, she grew anxious and ran off to spend that Christmas with Gio and unintentionally abandoning him for that time of grieving. The two had made up and talked things out, but she couldn't help but feel guilty when she thought back to that time. Valda hadn't been thinking clearly so she hadn't considered that her leaving him behind to grieve by himself had hurt him in a different way. She knew now what her actions had done and was grateful he was so caring and understanding, though there were still hard feelings shortly after that event.

"I've talked a lot about me and my not-so-great life. What about yours? What's your life like? Do you have a mother and father? Do they have jobs? Do you have siblings? Tell me some things about you. Your interests? Hobbies? Where are you from? I know nothing about you, and yet, here I am opening up about my whole life. You probably didn't want my whole biography. Sorry about that." She looked over at him, and once again, offered him a friendly smile. It wasn't necessarily as cheerful as it had been earlier when she first ran into him, but more of a friendly gesture to push him to open up. It was her little way of showing she was interested in him as a person and wanted to get to know him for who he was.

A connection she said? Was that a good thing or a bad thing? He was so unsure of everything in this moment about who he was and who this strong, but scared girl was. Nothing in the world made sense to this young man’s mind. Why couldn’t things be simple and pass by like the leaves that fell from the trees during the autumnal season? Yet they were able to easily communicate with each other which was certainly nice to Kes. He even gave a faint smile at the idea of being able to talk easily with someone for once. Maybe it wouldn’t have been a bad idea to have someone he could talk to instead of hiding his emotions and feelings inside him. Kes could possibly grow and become a much more open person and have more friends and that appealed to him a bit. It took him five years to possibly make a friend and it would be in the form of the girl before him.

She continued and kes could feel a slight sting in his heart when she said she saw a bit of her in him. He didn’t want anyone to compare themselves to him and his smile slightly faded. No one deserved to have gone through the issues he had to in his past and he certainly didn’t want to push his own problems on others. He gave an audible sigh as he gazed at her with pleading eyes of rue. Why was she so nice to him? It wasn’t that he didn’t appreciate it or anything, but despite her explanations he couldn’t believe her words. Kes felt this was going to just end up going in circles if he continued to talk about himself in the manner he wanted to. So he shook his head and looked around the area seeing a few onlookers giving them slight glances. Kes frowned and gave a particular rude looking girl, whom pointed at him while snickering with her group of friends, a sharp glare.

Valda then began to talk about her father and Kes could feel guilt filling his stomach. How could he make her talk about such heavy things? Sure his family had been separated by the ministry causing them great emotional grief, but he knew his father was still alive at least. This young woman had to deal with the reality of having a dead father and he couldn’t bare to think about the sadness she could be hiding. He shouldn’t have asked her about her life and let her keep the darkness in her heart hidden after all it was what he normally did. She was even an orphan which only made things worse in his mind. He couldn’t help himself and he got up and faced her with his shoulder squared towards her. Kes looked at her and did something he felt he never would have done for someone and grasped her into a hug. “I’m sorry,” he said quickly holding her close to him. His heart was beating rapidly and a small amount of red tinged his cheeks. He quickly let go and turned around and cleared his throat before adding, “Forgive me.” He closed his eyes and began to run as far away as he could his face burning red and his heart thudding out of his chest in both pain and frustration. Kes couldn’t figure out what he was doing anymore and he needed to get out and think about what he had said and done during their conversation. Maybe once he calmed down and collected his thoughts he could approach he again and he could properly articulate his thoughts better without leaving Valda in such a mess.

[[Out]]

It had all happened so suddenly, Valda hadn't quite registered what was going through his mind when he stood. She heard him apologize, but didn't see him move to her. She felt it though. It was slightly awkward because of the angle, but it was firm and....confusing. Valda wasn't quite sure where it had come from. What caused him to do it. And his apology- she wasn't quite sure why he had done it. Admittedly, she'd been having an urge to hug him ever since she found him after they had gotten separated. Had he done what he did and said what he said because she told him she was an orphan? Did he do it out of pity for her? Did he do it before he ran off because he was just overwhelmed and didn't want her to blame herself for why he ditched her? She wasn't sure, but she hadn't been offended by his sudden disappearance. Valda wish he had stayed so she could get to know him just a little better. She wished he had stayed so she wouls have then had time to hug him in return. Naturally, she was a hugger and couldn't help but feel like Kes really needed one to help him feel better about what worries and despairs were going theough his mind. She wished she had stayed longer so she could tell him she didn't mind talking about it and he shouldn't have to feel bad for asking her questions that caused her to do so.

Before she could say or do amyrhing, he was gone.

For the first time, she heard the gaggle of girls snickering to themselves on the sidelines. One even made a comment about how pathetic Valda must have been for Kes to run away from her. They were Russian and Valda assumed they were also students of Durmstrang. They were probably in their younger years. Otherwise, Valda would have assumed that a student she didn't fancy too well had been a part of those girls. Her hands reached into her pockets as she sat for a moment looking at her feet. Her cheeks were turning red at their comments which only made her freckles darker. Though she knew Kestutis hadn't intended to hurt her feelings, at least it hadn't come across that he had, she was lonely now and so many more questions than what she had before were surfacing.

Casually, she ran a hand through her hair and glanced in the girls' direction. She didn't recognize them as being older students. Her hand rested on her wand that was concealed in her pocket. She gripped it lightly while her thumb ran across the bottom of it. A disappointed sigh came from her as she stood. That was when she noticed his nearly-full tray of pani-puris and her empty one. She picked them up and headed towards an exit. Being of legal age now, she pulled her wand out and kept it hidden behind her back. With a swish and quiet mutter to herself, she jinxed one of the girls to vomit slugs. It was a personal favorite of hers. She knew it was petty and immature, but she might as well give life to the slimy words that came tumbling out of their mouths about she and Kes. What bettet way to do that than in the form of huge, massive, gooey, sticky slugs. Her wand was quickly thrown into her pocket and a smirk pulled at her lips when she heard them scream with terror. A pani-puri was smuggly plopped into her mouth. That ought to teach them. While she felt accomplished and slightly better herself, she couldn't help but wonder if Kes was okay. Rather than going after him, she made her way back to the main festival to distract herself.

[[Out]]