& these are the reasons I think that you're ill [edith]

Tuesday night practice was normally a highlight of Elias' week, a good opportunity to spend time outdoors and laugh with his teammates away from the stress of the Ministry. But on this particular evening, as he ran a towel over his freshly-washed hair in his small bathroom, he couldn't help looking back on the evening with more frustration than anything else. He had barely managed to keep up with the bludger that they had practiced with, uncharacteristically unfocused and forcing one of his chasers to do a roll maneuver when he failed to hit the massive black ball as it had flown right past him. Though his mates had brushed his distraction off, reminding him with a grin that he couldn't be there every time, he couldn't understand why on earth his playing had suddenly become less-than-stellar or why he had found himself thinking of other things than the dangerous speeding bullet that had been attempting to knock both him and his teammates off their brooms.

After hanging his towel neatly back on its bar, Elias wandered toward his bedroom and stared into his closet absently. He normally went out with the team after practice for a drink, but nearly everyone had needed to get home for one reason or another, so the weekly gathering had been moved to Thursday. He pulled on a pair of dark jeans and a grey shirt, resigning himself to the night alone that lay before him. He wasn't used to an evening in like this. Normally, Elias made it a priority to make plans for the evenings or else to bring work home with him in order to stay busy. His eyes landed on the copy of the Daily Prophet that was sitting on his desk in the corner, and figured he'd give the distraction a try.

Elias' fingers tapped idly on the table as he scanned the front page. It was a few days old, and he had already read most of the articles inside during his coffee breaks at work. His attention was caught as he flipped over the first page, hoping to catch a small piece that he had missed on his first read-through, when a familiar headline caught his eye: "Hogwarts Students Return to School, Ministry Assures Parents of Safety," and he felt his mind finally catch up with the discomfort he had been feeling in his body all week. He was surprised when his mind jumped immediately to his lingering concern about Edith, not having noticed how constantly she had been sitting in the back of his mind over the past few months. His initial fears for her physical safety had faded into concern for her well-being when he had heard that she had returned to London but not to work. His eyes shifted over to Elmar, who was sleeping in his cage, and felt a pang of annoyance when he recalled that Elmar had returned twice now after delivering a letter to the German's friend without carrying back a response.

Suddenly standing up, Elias walked back to the bathroom and was running a comb through his hair before he realized where he was planning to go. Pulling a jacket over his casual outfit, he grabbed his keys off the small table by the door and stepped out onto his doorstep. The lock clicked as he turned his key and in the next moment, he had turned on the spot and vanished into thin air. His desire to see Edith, to understand where she had gone, made it easy to feel his way through the pressing darkness to her street. He popped into existence on her corner, the darkness masking his sudden apparition.

He walked up her street calmly, wondering what had motivated his sudden decision to visit. He had tried, a few weeks prior, but she hadn't answered the door or been sitting in any of their usual pubs. Elias reached the door of Edith's apartment and knocked, hoping she would answer. He had met her a few times outside before, but never gone in. He hoped she wouldn't consider his visit an intrusion; he just wanted to see for himself that she was okay.

@Edith Holthouse

Knock, knock, knock. The sudden noise jolted her awake, and for the first three seconds post-sleep, Edith Holthouse had no idea where she was. The woman was laying on the couch in the small living room, sprawled out on her stomach. One arm was dangling towards the floor, her glasses were askew, and there was a distinct pile of drool under her mouth. There was a half empty can of beer near her dangling hand, and soon the picture formed itself for her.

She had ordered Indian food for delivery after waking up early in the afternoon and spending her day on the sofa drinking, but the lack of chana masala smell in the air told her that she had never received her order. Damn. Had she slept through the delivery? Her stomach gave a rumble as it turned over at the thought of food before she remembered what had woken her up in the first place: someone was at the door. Food was at the door. Probably the best part about living on the muggle side of London was having a phone to order food whenever she wanted.

"Be right there," she groaned, loud enough for the knocker to hear. She pushed herself up slowly, her back and bones creaking as she did so. She couldn't have been asleep for too long if the food was already here, right? True, she didn't know what time it was, or even what day it was, but the important thing was that the food was here.

She padded across the tiny room in an old, faded t-shirt, an even older pair of jeans, and a pair of wooly socks. She wiped the spit of her chin with one hand as she unlocked and opened the door with the other. "How mu--," Edith paused, halting her question about how much her order came out to, as she realized who she was actually looking at. Either Elias had changed careers and decided to go into the Indian food delivery business or this was not her dinner.

"Um," she said, unable to think of anything else she could say to him. He had tried this a couple days-- or was it weeks? -- ago, but she had ignored him then, not ready to get into what he surely wanted to get into. He actually cared about her, oddly enough, and she knew that she would need to tell him what happened to her. He would figure out that she wasn't okay, and that was one thing the woman was not ready to admit. But here he was now. Could she tell him to go away? Something told her that even if she did, he wouldn't listen, and she was too tired to fight him.

Instead of saying anything, Edith turned around and went back to the couch, leaving the door open behind her. He could come in if he wanted. Looking around the room, one would notice one distinct feature: old lady. Her roommate, Claudine, was at least eighty-four years old, and owned the majority of the furniture in their little, shared apartment. There was a distinct, perfumey smell, many doilies, and even more hanging portraits of cats. She was also a muggle, so Edith had found herself on more than once occasion obliviating her and getting rid of all signs of magic around the place. Tonight, however, Claudine was out, either playing bingo or speed walking around a shopping mall.

She plopped herself on the couch, pulling her knees up and crossing her legs underneath her. "So..." Edith said quietly, looking up at her friend. She didn't know what he wanted her to say, or if he wanted her to say anything at all, so she decided to stay silent.

As the door swung open and the scent of stale alcohol hit him, he felt all his hopes of confirming that Edith was perfectly fine fall away. It was immediately clear to him that she was far from fine: she was dressed in shabby muggle clothes, including a t-shirt with a wet stain below the collar. His eyes glided up to take in her messy hair, her clammy skin, and her confused eyes. His friend looked just as surprised to see him standing on her doorstep as he felt looking at her, and it was a moment before he could compose himself and take in her strange greeting -- if he could call it that. She was staring at him and he suddenly wished that he had thought a bit more carefully about why he was coming or what he might say to her if she was home. He supposed he had expected this to be more of a friendly visit: he would have smiled, slightly embarrassed, and explained that he had just wanted to check in on her as he had heard that she was ill; she would have laughed lightly at his worrying, assured him she was fine, and reminded him that they would see each other at the office soon.

Before he could rearrange his thoughts to fit the unnerving situation he had found himself in, Edith had turned on the spot and walked away from him, leaving the door hanging open behind her. Everything about their strange meeting was rubbing Elias the wrong way, and he wished he could back up a few moments and start it over. He hovered on the doorstep, his worried eyes following Edith as she sat herself down on the couch. He wondered if she had been living in her sitting room as he took in the beer cans that littered the floor and the blanket that was hanging off the seats of the sofa. The state of the area directly around the couch stood in stark contrast to the primped appearance of the rest of the apartment. What did this mean? Had she been too ill to leave her makeshift bed? Why had her roommate taken such care to keep the rest of the room so presentable but not helped his friend?

Edith finally looked over at him and spoke, clearly waiting for an explanation for his arrival. It was hardly an invitation to come inside, but she hadn't shut the door in his face, so he stepped tentatively inside, not breaking his gaze for a moment from her face as he did so. As worried as he was, and as much as he wanted to rush over and do what he could to help her, he didn't want to be impolite and enter a home where he wasn't wanted.

She seemed to be waiting for him to speak. He could see that she was hesitant, unsure what to make of his arrival, and he decided to try to take it slowly. "May I make you a cup of tea?"

Without waiting for an answer, he turned to the kitchenette and tapped the kettle that was sitting on her stove, filling it instantly with water. With another tap of his wand, the water was boiling. With one final wave of his wand, a cup and saucer with a rose pattern emerged before him. "Would you like black? Or something fruitier?" He eyed the many options that were stacked on a shelf over the counter, and wondered if the boxes were Edith's or her mysterious roommate's. He didn't actually know whether or not Edith was a tea-drinker, but his urge to clean her up and take care of her was strong, and he thought this would be a good first step. She looked like she might need something to drink.

He carried the cup over to Edith, and placed it on the coffee table in front of her. "May I sit?" he asked politely, indicating the cushion next to where she was sitting.

Edith slipped thin fingers under her glasses, gently rubbing the sleep out of her eyes as she waited for Elias to do or say anything. She had finally figured out how to sleep without dreaming, to keep the images that were keeping her awake out of her head. And now, she had finally fallen asleep and actually slept well, only to be woken up by the appearance of her friend -- no, she was mad, this was her colleague -- and he couldn't even be courteous enough to bring her channa masala.

He didn't wait for an answer as he offered to make tea, so she just shrugged. She was fairly certain that even if she said no, he would do it anyway. Edith narrowed her eyes as Elias flitted around her tiny kitchen, a few steps away on the other side of the living room. It had been a while since this apartment had seen any magic; Edith had found that doing everything the muggle way (minus the sleeping draughts) was somehow soothing, and Claudine wasn't about to charm anything soon. "Black," she answered when prompted, not bothering to get up or offer to help. What she really wanted was another beer. She could feel her last one wearing off. Maybe she had been asleep longer than she had thought.

She nodded at his request to sit, somewhat upset that he had used the word "may" instead of "can" because she really felt that answering him with a "I don't know, can you?" would have been much more enjoyable for her than a simple nod. Oh well. She picked up the cup, leaving the saucer behind.

"Sh*t, this is hot," Edith breathed, bringing the cup away from her lips and feeling them tenderly with her free hand. She leaned down to set the cup on the small table in front of her and moved to fish her wand out of her pocket, but she didn't find it there. She leaned down farther to look under the table, under the couch, straightened up to look beside her, but it was no where to be found. She shrugged, rather unworried about what had happened to it. Her tea would just have to cool down the normal way and she could worry about her wand later.

But more importantly, Elias wasn't here to just make her tea and then leave. "If this is about work, I've already talked to my supervisor, and he knows what's going on." This was the longest sentence she had spoken all week to someone who wasn't about to give her food or drink. She reached over to dip the tip of her finger in her tea to test the temperature, then pulled it back and wiped it on her shirt. "I'll be back in March," she added with a nod, unaware that it already was March and she had somehow managed to miss the news.

Edith wasn't sure if anyone else who had dealt with the dome was feeling like this, but she wasn't about to start asking around. "So don't worry, I am doing great."

Elias lowered himself down onto the cushion next to Edith when she gave her permission and watched her closely as she lifted the tea cup to her lips and then pulled away, complaining about the heat. He wanted to reach out to her, though he wasn't sure why or what exactly the gesture would do. It was just so frustrating to sit here, barely talking, and look at this strange version of his friend. The urge to fix things was inhibited by his inability to identify what was wrong with the woman. Before he could act on the instinct to grasp her arms and talk to her, really talk to her, she was twisting around, looking confused. She peered under the table and then bent full over to stare under the couch.

"What is it? What do you need?" He was desperate to be doing something, to be doing anything that might help him understand where she had been or why she looked so ill or what was on her mind. But she had already shrugged, blowing off her strange behavior. He wanted to press the subject, but suddenly Edith was talking to him, and he immediately stopped so that he could focus on her words. He was more interested in what she had to say than fetching what she was looking for, anyway.

Was this about work? To be honest, he wasn't quite sure. He supposed he should be worried about her professionally -- would she lose her job after missing so much work? -- but he had assumed all along that the office knew why she hadn't been coming in, and just was choosing not to share that information with him. After all, they worked in different departments and he didn't know her department head well enough to be prying for details. As Edith dipped her finger in the scalding hot tea and then pulled it quickly away, he suddenly realized what she must have been looking for in her empty pockets. If the tea was too hot, why didn't the witch just cool it down a bit? He felt a tightening in his stomach as he pulled his own wand back out of his pocket and murmured, "Accio," hoping that her wand was in the vicinity.

The thin piece of wood came flying out of a vase that was standing on a small table next to the front door. He caught it in midair, confusion covering his face as he took in the decorative sticks that filled the pot. What on earth had her wand been doing in there? He would never claim to have much of an eye for interior design, but unless this was some strange defensive system his friend had rigged up, Elias suspected that his friend had actually managed to lose her wand. What was worse, she didn't seem to care. He was on the brink of handing her the wand when her words registered with him, and he suddenly dropped the hand that was holding her wand back down at his side.

"Edith."

Her name came out almost sternly in his attempt to stop her from blowing off his concern. Elias was staring at her seriously, trying to see past the overly casual look that was on her face. Why was she being so distant? Weren't they closer than this, past the formality and stiff appearances of colleagues? He wanted her to hear him, to understand how much he cared about her. Elias needed her to talk, to be vulnerable, to say whatever it was that she lacked so that he could fill whatever void was in her life.

"Do you know what day it is?" His own face displayed nothing but concern. He wanted to be gentle, but her words unnerved him. "It's already the thirteenth of March. Were you supposed to come back at the beginning of the month?"

She noticed Elias get his wand back out and she hoped that maybe he would cool her tea down for her instead of waiting for the elements to take care of it. But apparently he had figured out what she was looking for and had decided to take matters into his own hands. Edith watched with eyes wide as her wand dislodged itself from one of Claudine's decorative vase of dead sticks, her mouth forming into an "o" that could have been comical in any other situation. Elias caught it before Edith even had time to react to it and she was about to thank him and take back what was hers when he apparently changed his mind.

"Elias." She retorted with his name, just as gruff as he had said hers. She attempted to scrunch up her face in mock anger, but it didn't take long for her to get close to the actual emotion. Was he seriously going to withhold her wand to get her to talk? If that was really the case, she would much rather get a job as a muggle rubbish collector than talk about her feelings. Edith hadn't even been able to admit to herself that she had actual emotions and she wasn't about to to do it now.

She didn't want to answer him when he asked if she knew what day it was. It didn't matter what day it was. United weren't playing today, that was what mattered. Edith didn't respond, didn't move, didn't want to give Elias any reason to stay longer than he needed to. But then he told her what day it was. He was kidding, right? If it was already March, did she even have a job anymore? They would definitely have to let her know if they were firing her, right? Whatever the answer was, Edith definitely did not want to deal with it right now.

"No it's not," Edith said with a shake of her head. Surely she would have known if it had been March for thirteen days already. Her hand was still outstretched to take her wand from him. "I'll be having my wand now, thank you," she stated matter-of-factly, opening and closing her hand a couple times to motion it towards her. If he gave it back now, she could be convinced not to hex him once she got it. The same couldn't be said if she had to fight him for it. He was a head taller and was at least a small child's worth heavier than her, but she really had nothing left to lose at this point.

The look of surprise on Edith's face as her wand flew toward him was enough to convince Elias that she had had absolutely no idea where her wand was or why it was being incorporated into the apartment's decorations. She reached out for her wand but he was distracted from her attempt to retrieve it by their conversation. As she repeated his name back to him, sarcasm dripping from the three short but exaggerated syllables, he reminded himself that he wasn't here to fight. He wasn't going to allow her attempts at nonchalance to dissuade him, and he certainly wasn't going to take the bait to fight with her. Not when there was something upsetting her like this. He refused to believe that it was his fault that she was acting this way. No, there was something more going on here, and he was determined to uncover it.

Elias raised his eyebrows as she contradicted him. Ignoring her outstretched hand, he lifted his left wrist and pointed with the two wands that were in his right hand at the face of his golden watch. The date was easily readable along the top of the face, curved underneath the top numbers in a golden cursive. It was in German, sure, but he felt confident that Edith was clever enough to interpret the words: Dienstag, der 13. März, 2001.

"Edith," he repeated her name again. She could beckon all she wanted, but he had her attention now and he needed answers. If holding her wand hostage meant that she might talk, then that was the path he would take. "You haven't answered my question. Were you supposed to be back two weeks ago? Why haven't you replied to my letters? I've been very worried about you." It was easy to be honest with her. He could see that she was hurting and he wanted her to understand that he was her friend. She could talk to him. Hadn't they grown closer over the past few years working together?

He tapped her cup of tea, applying a gentle cooling charm so that she could drink it without burning her lip again. He awkwardly lifted the cup left-handed, trying to avoid setting the wands down. He had no malicious intentions, but there was a mutinous look in her eye that told him it might be in his best interest to keep their interaction non-magical for the time being. As he handed her the tea, he looked at her seriously with his blue eyes shining earnestly. "Please, talk to me."

Edith dropped the hand waiting for her wand and scooted a tad closer to Elias, getting her face as close to his watch face as she could without actually touching him. It was in German, but she got the gist. March, definitely March. She retreated back to her original position, fixing her gaze on Elias's face, trying to figure out what he wanted to hear.

"I mean..." her voice trailed off not really knowing where she was going to go with this sentence. "I mean technically I'm on leave and said I would aim to be back in March." She swallowed hard before adding, "For health reasons." But if Elias had sent her letters and she didn't remember receiving them, then maybe she had received some from the Ministry as well? Surely her supervisor understood what was happening though. She had explained everything to him, leaving out the near-death experiences and the nightmares keeping her awake. And honestly, at this point, being let go wouldn't be the worst thing to happen to her this year.

"I didn't respond because I didn't get any letters. I don't know where they are," and that was the truth. For all she knew, Claudine had found them on the window ledge and thought she had her own secret admirer. It wouldn't have been the first time her roommate had intercepted something magical by mistake. "I just needed to, I don't know." Edith looked away from him, her gaze focused on a cat portrait across the room. She didn't know what she needed. She had thought that crying about it would make her feel better, but no matter how hard she tried, the tears wouldn't come.

And that was just peachy that he was worried, but what good was that going to do her now? If he was so worried, why hadn't he tried to help her when she actually needed it? She was at Hogwarts for a month, dealing with everything horrible that dome could think to throw at her. Blast-ended skrewts, boggarts, inferi, you name it, it was there, and it was trying to kill them. And all of this happened just as she had gotten over the whole Battle of Hogwarts thing. It wasn't easy seeing people die in front of her, being injured herself, and then to be there all over again, thinking she was going to die. And unlike all those other Ministry idiots that wanted to be there, Edith had shown up accidentally because the floo network went crazy.

"I needed your help two months ago." She was talking quietly, still not looking at her friend. "You must have known I didn't go there on purpose. I'm not that stupid and I'm definitely not that brave." She wasn't sure where the words were coming from, but they were coming fast. She turned back to look at Elias, her eyes narrowed. "You have to know by now what happened there and me telling you every single detail isn't going to help anyone." The volume of her voice was raising now, her hands clenching into fists as she spoke. "So it really is great that you care but it really, really isn't helping."

"So really, how much more talking do you want me to do? Are you seriously going to hold my wand ransom right now?" Even if she didn't want to use it for stupid things like making tea, it was still hers and she had rights. She reached out with an open palm to hit Elias's hand that was holding on to their wands. "Give it." She was standing now and put forth another attempt to slap his hand. "Give me my wand."

So she was still on official leave. Elias supposed that explained why no one else seemed particularly panicked about her absence, but he still thought someone ought to have checked on her by now. It always surprised him when he saw how content some people were to focus on their own lives most of the time; he spent most of his thinking about his friends, his family, his coworkers, his teammates. It seemed like he barely had room to worry about himself when he was running around trying to save others at every possible moment. And right now, he felt that Edith was in need of saving.

Edith added that she had been gone for health reasons. Well, that was what he had guessed, and especially now that he was seeing her it was clear that she wasn't feeling well. He wasn't used to seeing her so pale and tired. But it also didn't seem like anything that serious; at least, not physically. She had made it this long, hadn't she? And as far as he had heard, she had made no trips to St. Mungo's. He was beginning to suspect that her ailments were more emotional than physical.

"You didn't get my letters?" Elias was surprised. Elmar hadn't failed to make a delivery before, as far as he knew, and the owl had returned empty-clawed both times. If she didn't have them, where had they gone? Trying not to feel hurt that Edith didn't seem concerned about their loss, he watched as she shifted her gaze away. He didn't want to lose her again into that sulky silence. He raised his left hand, moving to touch her shoulder, but she was looking at him again now, a cold expression on her face.

He pulled his arm back, stung by her words. She wasn't being fair. Of course he wished that he could have been there in January. He would have marched right into the castle to go after her if he could, but he had responsibilities: siblings to think about, professional obligations, parents to appease. He couldn't just have disappeared into the castle and risked his life like that, not when there were so many people counting on him. Not to mention the magical barrier that stood in his way as well as the tight control the British Ministry was maintaining over the whole situation. They weren't exactly taking foreign volunteers with no actual combat experience and sending them into battle.

"And you must know I would have been there if I could," he told her seriously, a touch of sadness coming through in his voice. "You know that, Edith. You must know it was killing me, not knowing what happened. It was difficult to find out where you had gone for the first few weeks, and then when the dome went down, you didn't write or come to the door." His words weren't intended to be accusatory; they were more desperate at this point as he tried to explain his failure to protect her. He hated that he had failed and was desperate to earn her forgiveness. He wanted to make up for the time she had been alone.

But his words didn't seem to be helping his cause. She was swatting at his hand, trying to grab her wand. As she stood up, he mirrored her and took a step back. "I'm not holding your wand ransom, Edith, I just -- " he side-stepped as she slapped at him again. With every moment, it was feeling like a worse idea to return the wand; if she was planning to get into a fight, he would much prefer that whatever hexes she had in mind be kept out of it. He couldn't in good conscience get into a physical fight with a woman, but he certainly wasn't going to duel a friend. Especially one in need. "Would you please calm down? I'm just trying to talk to you."

Of course she knew that he would have been there if he could. That's what everyone was telling her. Everyone had their excuses though. How many of them actually tried to get in though? Right, none of them. So however sincere his words were, Edith didn't want to hear it. Of course she didn't write. What did anyone want to know? How every day she would go down to the edge of the dome and hit the air to try and find a weak spot? How even though some kids managed to find a way out, dumb ol" Edith was just as stuck as ever? How every day seemed like it was made up of a hundred hours?

No one wanted to hear that. People just wanted her to smile and move on, keep her head down and do her work. Edith hadn't once stopped to consider that maybe Elias didn't fit into the pool of people that she was making assumptions about, that maybe they were actually friends that cared about each others' wellbeing instead of the usual drinking buddies she was familiar with. Whatever the case, Edith wasn't going to change her mind that easily.

"And I am just trying to get my wand back. I don't want to calm down. Don't tell me what to do!" She took a step and closed the space between them in an effort to get closer to her wand. She would feel so much better if she could have it, even if five minutes ago she had no idea that it was missing. But he was either too quick or she was too drunk, no matter how much she tried to finagle the wands from his hand, nothing was working. As a last resort, Edith drew her arms back before shoving forward, her palms landing square on Elias's chest.

Of course, Edith's complete lack of upper body strength only caused Edith to stumble backward with the force of her own push. Her foot caught the flowery rug underneath her just perfectly and before she could react or throw her arm out for support, her ass was on the ground. She landed relatively sitting up and did her best to throw Elias a look that she just dared him to try and help her.

But apparently this was what finally did it, what finally triggered the emotional response that Edith had been building up for over two months now. The first tear was the perfect theatrical one, streaking down her cheek, but the rest that followed just served to prove that the woman was an ugly crier. She threw her hands up, sliding her fingers under her glasses, as she pulled her knees up closer to her chest and let out a long "Fuuuh," sigh.

Edith was yelling now and Elias was still backing up, trying to figure out how his simple attempt to check in on his friend had blown up so dramatically. He had just wanted to make her a cup of tea, chat for a bit, and find out when she would be coming back to work. He had only wanted to help. Elias' eyes widened in shock as Edith suddenly lunged forward, shoving her hands into his chest furiously. He reacted instinctively, tensing his upper body slightly so that he wouldn't fall back from the impact. Although his defensive move had allowed him to remain on his feet, the same couldn't be said for Edith: the force that she had directed toward him had instead pushed her backwards and knocked her onto the floor.

The expression on her face gave new meaning to the phrase if looks could kill, but he didn't care. In the next moment, he had circled behind her and dropped to the ground beside her, sliding in closer so that his right leg was at her side, his left folded in between them. Before she could try to stop him, he had dropped the wands he was holding and reached around to pull her into a tight hug, cradling her head under his chin. She was shaking with tears and all he could think to do in that moment was try to hold her together as best he could.

"I'm sorry," he whispered into her hair, feeling the guilt weighing down in his stomach. "I'm so sorry, Edith." He wished that he could fix things for her, that he could uncover whoever or whatever it was that had hurt her so deeply, that he could gently apply a plaster and give her wounds a little kiss and that all her pain would go away. He had never seen his friend weep like this, so open and raw. As alarming as it had been to see her lose control and burst into tears, he was comforted to see that she seemed to have moved past resentment and taken a step toward sharing whatever was going on in her head.

He pulled away slightly so that he could look at her face, hating the tears that were dripping down her cheeks and the pain they represented. He wanted to reach out and wipe them away gently with his thumb, but he suspected she would hate the feeling of being treated like a child. "Do you want me to go?" He would hate to leave her like this, but maybe what she really needed was some time alone. At least he knew now that she hadn't dropped dead in her apartment, though what he had observed during his visit would hardly be a comfort to him in the days to follow. He wouldn't be able to tell himself now that Edith was fine, not after seeing her like this.

He glanced down at the wands he had dropped by his side in his desperation to get to her. "Want to hex me? I probably deserve it." He was mostly kidding, but perhaps they both would feel a bit better if Edith jinxed him in return for the poor job he had done of being her friend over the past few weeks.

What was happening? What little she had planned to do today, this was definitely not part of it. She felt herself breaking, melting into the floor, trying to disappear. She didn't cry and she definitely didn't cry in front of other people, especially people she was mad at when she was trying to prove that she was a well-adjusted person. But everything she had been feeling for two months, as well as things that she hadn't admitted to even herself, were happening now.

It wasn't until her body shook with a huge sigh that she felt Elias's arms around her. When did he get there? She wanted to fight him, but the pressure -- the hug -- was oddly comforting in a way she couldn't explain. In addition to never crying, Edith also never hugged. But apparently tonight was a night for trying new things. She felt herself nodding in response to his apologies; they were unnecessary apologies. He hadn't done anything. He was just trying to help, wasn't he? And now he was apologizing that Edith had gone and made an ass out of herself and was reaping what she had sown.

She was still steadfastly holding her eyes shut, her fingers wiping at her tears every few seconds. She wasn't even thinking about the dome anymore, thinking about everything that was there and how much she had hated it and wanting nothing more than to go home. All Edith could think about was how this was actually making her feel better, even marginally so.

Edith shook her head almost immediately after Elias asked if she wanted him to go. "No," her voice cracked. The worst of the sobbing and shaking was over, but the tears were still flowing. "Please stay," she said quietly with a sniffle. She leaned back into him, her sobs slowly subsiding into more sniffles. She wasn't sure how much time had passed before Elias spoke again. "What?" She picked her head to and looked round and saw both of their wands lying next to where they were huddled together. "No," she sniffed, rubbing the moisture from her nose. "I mean, yes." Edith managed to laugh, happy that Elias wasn't still prying into things.

She attempted to hug him back to the best of her abilities, but it was difficult given her position. "I'm sorry," she nodded as thoughts slowly started coming back into her mind. "It was just... hard. Hogwarts was supposed to be a safe place, you know?" She was still speaking quietly, but her voice was clearer now. "Being there for the battle was terrible enough, but at least all of that had a good outcome, in the end." You-Know-Who was gone and done for. "But now," what good came out of the dome? "Nothing." And they still had no idea what had caused it to come up in the first place, or fall down later, or why it was spawning everything that it did.

"Want to go for a walk?" Edith sniffed again, this time with more finality. She thought she actually felt better. And with any luck, she could get the walk to end at a pub.

Elias was relieved that she didn't pull away. She was nodding into his chest as he apologized, probably getting tears and snot all over his shirt, but he didn't mind. He felt the tiniest bit of guilt slip away as she nodded in response to his apologies. He still hated that he had let her down and that he had driven her into this state, but her acknowledgement of his apology was a good first step. For now, he was happy to hold her as long as she needed, and this wasn't a particularly nice shirt anyway. She asked him to stay with her and he just drew a little closer in response, trying to prove that he was here for her however she needed him, even if all she needed right now was for him to be a human tissue.

He smiled a bit as his crying mess of a friend let out a half laugh, half sob in response to his question. He jokingly raised his hands into the air, miming surrender in case she wanted a clear shot, but quickly returned his arms to their place around her. He wasn't quite ready to let go yet, not when she was still so weak. There would be time later for her to make his nose hair grow or his feet get tangled if she wanted. He wouldn't stop her, that much he knew.

As he held her tightly, he listened somberly to her words about her time in Hogwarts. She didn't offer many details about what had occurred, but he felt the emotion behind them. He had spent some time at Hogwarts himself in his seventh year. Though he had never completely related to the feeling of home that many of the British students associated with their school, he had sensed that the community there was much different than it had been at Durmstrang. He admired his own school, sure, but it had never felt like a second home to him, not in the way that Edith was describing.

He let the younger woman talk without interrupting, nodding along to show that he was listening. It hurt him to hear her bring up the suffering she had faced at the Battle of Hogwarts while he had been hiding in Germany, concerning himself with quidditch and other frivolous things. He felt a pang of regret that he had not been at Hogwarts for either dangerous time that Edith had faced. As horrifying as the dome sounded, he wanted to be able to relate to her. To be able to comfort her with his own insight from the experience would make him feel useful in this moment.

Elias reached out and took the tea cup that was still sitting on the coffee table. It was a bit of a stretch, but he didn't want to take his wand back up yet, in case Edith thought he was going for hers again. The tea had been sitting long enough to be pleasantly warm now, but he still tested the side of the cup carefully with the tip of his finger to make sure she wouldn't burn herself. He adjusted Edith's position a bit so that she could hold the tea cup and then placed it in her hands. "You should drink this," he reminded her. "You look a bit dehydrated."

Elias supervised her as she drank the tea. After a few quiet moments, Edith was looking a bit better. He smiled down at her encouragingly upon her request. Whatever she needed right now, he was here to provide. He nodded in agreement and took back the now-empty cup. "I'll just clean up a bit first," he told her softly. He stood up and brought the cup into the kitchen. His wand was still on the ground by the sofa, so he turned on the tap and held the cup underneath. He squeezed too much soap out of the bottle that was standing on the counter, not being an experienced muggle dishwasher, but after a few extra rinses he got the job done.

He put the cup away in the cabinet above the sink, going a bit slower than necessary to give Edith time to clean herself up a bit while his back was turned if she wanted. He shut the cabinet door and turned back to the witch. "Lead the way?"

This was the hug to end all hugs. It definitely filled Edith's quota for hugs for the rest of the year. However much she was unaccustomed to any sort of physical contact, what was happening now was definitely helping. She nearly protested when Elias moved, lessening the pressure just so, but couldn't find the words. Open hands accepted the tea, and she simply nodded and did what he said. All that crying, on top of not knowing the last time she had water, on top of her body being mostly alcohol at this point, the tea was definitely a welcome choice. She drank it quickly, not realizing how thirsty she had been, and silently handed the cup back to Elias.

She watched with slight amusement as he fiddled around in the little kitchen once again, this time without magical assistance. Her brows raised as she looked down to realize that her wand was just out of reach, hers obviously shorter and lighter than the one laying next to it. Getting her hands on her wand was the final push of motivation she needed to get up; she snatched it up off the ground as she pushed herself up into a standing position. She stood there for a moment, idly twirling her wand in her hand as she watched Elias working in the kitchen. She would never hex someone with their back turned, but he had asked for it...

The woman smiled as she mentally promised to just owe him one later and stowed her wand in her back pocket. She suddenly realized how moist her face felt, which must match nicely with what must be puffy eyes. Edith plodded down the hallway of the little apartment to her bedroom. It was in a much larger state of disarray so at least she had her breakdown in a room that was at least somewhat tidy. Instead of changing into a fresh tee, she glanced around the room at the piles of clothes and pulled a sweater at random off the closest pile. She brought it up to her nose to do a quick sniff check and it certainly smelled clean enough, which was good enough for her.

Pulling it over her head, she managed to sit down on the edge of her small bed, slip her feet into her only pair of shoes, and tie them tightly. Finishing this, she sat squarely on the edge, glancing across the small space to the mirror on the wall. Honestly, no amount of cleaning up would really make her presentable, but thankfully she had just cried all over Elias so simply not falling apart again should be an improvement for him. Still, Edith reached up to pat her hair into place, rub the rest of the crying gunk out of her eyes, and give her nose a final swipe.

After a quick trip to the loo, Edith reentered the living room to find Elias still dealing with the cup. Bless, doing things the primitive way. He was done before she could even think about offering to help, which was fine with Edith. "Out, first," She nodded to the door and waited for Elias to grab his wand and exit first; she followed him out the door, locking it with a tap of her wand.

Once they were on the street, she pointed left and let themselves walk on in silence for a few moments. Her thoughts fell back on what had transpired back in her living room, how she still hadn't told him anything. All he really wanted to do was help, but Edith was having a difficult time processing what that actually meant. She had been refusing all offers for help, what little number of them there were, choosing instead to just not think about things. Clearly, that option didn't have good outcomes.

"Thanks," Edith finally said, just loud enough to be heard by only the man she was walking next to. "If you want to know stuff, I'll tell you anything." She nodded, not looking at him. It would be a lot easier to say anything if she could pretend she was just saying it to herself. 

Although she had now finished what Elias guessed might have been her first cup of water in a while, Edith looked as though she was far from put back together. When Elias turned back to face her after his ridiculously-slow work with the tea cup and saucer, he took in her swollen eyes and the tangled hair that she had apparently attempted to tame during her quick trip out of the room. He walked back into the living room area where she was waiting for him and picked up the wand that he had left lying on the ground a few minutes before. He noticed that Edith's had disappeared, and he tried to remind himself that she was perfectly entitled to having her wand back. She didn't need him to keep track of her things for her, being an adult and a ministry employee at that.

She nodded him toward the door and he obliged silently, realizing as he stepped outside that he had never even removed his jacket, having been distracted by the urge to take control of the situation and uncover what had been going on. He tucked his wand into an inside breast pocket before stuffing his hands into his pockets, crossing his hands a bit beneath the fabric to pull the jacket close around him. It was late, and the lack of sunlight made it feel more like February than mid-March. He was fairly unfamiliar with the area, it being a rather non-central and non-magical area of London, and he oriented himself to be able to respond to her direction. All the same, he would have been more focused on Edith's every step even if he had known this place like the back of his hand. He was trying to get a sense of how she was feeling or what she wanted from him so that he could be there for her however she wanted it.

With a point to the left, Edith was leading him down her empty street. She didn't say anything, and Elias let her walk in silence, listening to their feet crunching over the dirty path and trying not to stare at his companion. He allowed himself to glance sideways at her every few steps, ready to respond in case she suddenly had another meltdown. Her single whispered word of thanks barely reached his ears, but he could still hear in it that she genuinely was grateful that he had come. He was relieved to hear it. He felt sure that he was helping, but all the same, he wanted Edith to see it too. It was hard to be there for someone who denied that they needed anyone else.

"I only want to know if you feel comfortable telling me," Elias told her seriously when she offered to divulge all. "I didn't come to interrogate you. I just wanted to see how you were and see if there was anything I could do to help." He really meant it, and he hoped that she would be able to tell. He had never been a nosy person, never tried to force personal details from others; he didn't find such behavior very dignified. "But if you want to get things off your chest, I'm ready to listen, Edith." He reached out for her shoulder and stopped her for a moment, looking at her seriously. "If talking will help you cope with whatever happened, then that's what I want for you. If you just want to try to have a normal night, then I can be here for that, too."

He held her gaze for just a moment, hoping that she would understand what he was trying to communicate. She was doing her best not to look at him, that he could see, but this was the best way he knew to help her sense that he was genuinely ready to do whatever she wanted. With a small smile, he turned back to look down the street and started walking again beside her. "Are you taking us somewhere in particular? Or do you just want to wander around for a while?"