Magical Hogwarts

Transylvania, Romania | August 2005
But I can't see you every night
No, I can’t see you every night - free

He didn’t really know what he expected about this meeting, but with everything happening so quickly between his sister running away, his family’s mourning, his breakup with Elvira, and his move back to Romania–Roman realized that he had not yet told his best friend about any of the things that had happened recently. While Dimos and Roman still wrote and talked often, they had not seen one-another in nearly a year, and there was some part of them that had grown a little distant. Not necessarily “grown apart” but there was some distance there that had not been there before when they were seeing each other every day. In some ways, Roman was very excited to see Dimos again and catch him up. He hoped it wouldn’t be a bad time.

He knocked on the door rhythmically, a knock they always used for one-another, and hoped Dimos would immediately know who was standing there. He had not written in advance, so this was all a surprise. A big surprise. He cleared his throat as he waited (a bit impatiently) for Dimos to come to the door. When the door did open, and he saw his best friend, he smiled broadly.

“Hey!” He greeted. “I really hope this isn’t a bad time, but I fucking missed you, man.” He smiled. “Can I come in?” He asked, already starting to enter without being officially invited–opposite of a vampire. “The place looks nice, man. From the outside, at least. I bet it’s really cozy.” He paused.

“How are you?” He asked. “How have things been? It’s felt like ages since I’ve last seen you.”

@Dimos Klein

Dimos bit back a groan of relief as the potion slid down his throat and a minute later, he could feel the sharp pain digging into his skull soften. He had ended up drinking way too much last night—he and Lev both, and although by the time they got back to his place they had sobered up a little, they spent the several next hours in the bedroom very much not sleeping, until they had little choice but to drop from exhaustion.

Unlike Lev, Dimos' body had the cursed habit of waking up at early hours regardless of previous activities, and so he found himself awake around eight, but hadn't dragged himself out until much later. He wasn't sure how many hours in total he had slept, but he would've been surprised if it was more than three. Lev was still in his bed, dead to the world, and Dimos let him sleep as long as he wanted, he wasn't rushing to work today.

He slipped on fresh underwear, slipping inside the bathroom to refresh himself, and then left for the kitchen, wanting something to eat. He cooked a little more, in case Lev wanted something to eat once he woke up, and was sitting at the table, eating (a very late breakfast indeed), when the knock sounded. Dimos hadn't expected any visitors today—he had a day off and was planning to spend it recovering from last night and relaxing. For that reason therefore, when he heard the knock on his door, he froze a little, in surprise. It took him about two seconds before his brain started up again and he realised it was Roman, because yes, they had a knocking pattern for each other.

He panicked internally, at first, because he hadn't seen Roman in a whole year. Not since he moved away with his girlfriend (and hadn't that hurt like hell). They talked often, but Dimos couldn't help but love and hate the space that had started growing between them as a result of the distance. On one hand, it was much easier on his heart—not having the man he was in love with around him all the time (or his girlfriend)—on the other hand, he had missed his best friend like crazy.

He got up from the table without a second thought, and made a beeline for the door, then paused halfway, realising he was only in his underwear (not like Roman hadn't seen him without less), but he became hyperaware of the hickies on his body and opted for a shirt. For that reason it took him a little longer to get to the door, grabbing a shirt, it didn't cover up some of the hickeys on his neck, but he thought it looked decent enough.

He couldn't help and mirror the large smile, when he opened the door and he saw Roman standing there. "Hola." He chuckled, eyes bright, not at all surprised by Roman pushing his way inside his home–wasn't the first time. "Could be a worse time," he grinned, a little excited, closing the door behind him, "take your shoes off," he ordered, feeling pleased at the other's compliment about his home. "It's a nice place, quiet and comfortable." He loved the nature that surrounded him.

He ran a hand over his curly hair, "um, actually I'm having breakfast." He admitted. "Late breakfast. Can you keep it down for like twenty seconds so I can find my wand? Lev's still sleeping, and I don't want to wake him up." He told him. He saw no reason to pretend he was alone here, Roman would be bound to find out anyway, if Lev woke up at some point.

"I mean, it's been a year, Jonas." He chuckled, but there was a slight undertone of bitterness. He has had moments, where he had felt hurt, that now that Roman had a girlfriend, suddenly, he did not seem to have the time to come see his best friend—or just didn't make such an effort to do so. He knew the pain was there because of how he felt about Roman in the first place, and Dimos found it exhausting trying to avoid it. He'd long since stopped trying to push what he felt for Roman down or away, or trying to diminish it. He'd kept silent on it for so long, kept it to himself only, but now Lev knew too, and it somehow felt a little better. "Minus some personal drama, I've been doing good, the dragons keep me busy," he chuckled.

He found his wand on the counter in the kitchen, and murmured a charm, that would lower their volume, but if Lev woke up, he would be able to hear he's not alone. Then he settled back down with his food, smiling at the other, "what's with the sudden visit?" He asked, curious. "Not that I'm not happy to see you, just didn't expect it." He admitted.

Breakfast? It was a little late for that, but Roman was not one to judge. It must have been Dimos’ day off, and he could 100% understand the desire to sleep in a little. Not that sleeping in was necessarily Dimos’ style, he supposed. Hearing that Lev was there, though, asleep in Dimos’ room gave Roman a little pause. They weren’t…. were they? He had never been close with Lev, himself, but he knew the boy through Dimos. Lev had always given Roman ultra-macho homophobic elitist asshole vibes, honestly, but Dimos knew him better and had always been close with him, so there was possibly more to the story. Even so, Roman could not hide that look of confusion and slight jealousy at the mention of the other boy and the potential of them being more than friends.

Roman had been with Dimos for awhile with no regrets, but the way they ended their physical relationship left him a little bit bitter. It had been part of what had made him choose to pursue Elvira in the first place. Dimos clearly either didn’t know what he wanted or wanted a variety of lovers, though, so Roman tried to not hold it against him, even if it hurt to have felt cast aside by his best friend just when he was thinking that they might progress into more. First Nikon, then several others, now potentially Lev? When was Dimos planning on no-longer fucking around and actually getting serious about someone? Anyone?

“Oh, I didn’t realize you had company. I guess that’s my fault for not owling ahead, but I almost wanted it to be a surprise. It’s been so long. Like you said, a year.” He wanted to go in for a hug, but his slight jealousy was making him a bit standoffish despite himself. He didn’t move for it.

“I’m… coming home.” He said, finally, after a beat. “Vera ran away, man.” He explained. Dimos, of course, knew of Roman’s sister and how close the two had been their whole lives. “She went off with a pack of bloodsuckers. Mom and dad aren’t very optimistic, and we haven’t heard anything from her… so, we can only assume she.. well, you know.” He sighed. This was not the most fun conversation. “But after Elvira and I split up, I had no reason not to come home and take care of the family, you know? I was actually thinking that you might help me get a job here, helping with the dragons.” He mentioned. “I have experience, as you know, and I think it would be nice. But that wasn’t really why I came to see you, that’s just why I’m back. And I’m staying this time, so we should end up seeing more of each other now.” He smiled lightly.

Dimos shifted in his seat, settling down a little more, reaching for a few plates with food he had served up before Roman started knocking at his door. "Yeah, we went out last night, took a portkey to Barcelona again and we ended up getting smashed," he chuckled, digging into his plate with fervour. "Pretty sure I slept like three hours, and I'm probably being generous." He was doing quite well, considering how little sleep he had gotten though. "Honestly, it's fine. I have a day off, so I'm not rushing anywhere." He assured him, "have the time to catch up." He added, smiling. He was perhaps a little surprised that Roman hadn't tried to hug him, and he wondered if the expression on his face earlier had anything to do with Lev...did Roman guess that there was something going on between him and Lev? He had looked a bit bothered, and Dimos couldn't help but wonder, if there was a part of Roman that was jealous. However, he didn't want to get his hopes up, and didn't dwell on it.

He frowned briefly as he tasted some of the eggs, noting they were not salty enough and reached for some salt on the opposite side of the table, while his shirt rolled lower a bit, revealing a few of the hickeys Lev left on his skin, still angry and vibrant. He looked up at Roman again, a slight grin playing on his lips. "Feel free to have a bite, if you want, I made some more in case Lev will be hungry once he wakes up, but I can always make more." He knew Roman liked his cooking.

Dimos did have a look of surprise on his face, when Roman told him he was moving back home. Then his expression turned into a mixture of shock and pain, hearing about Vera. He hadn't been as close to her as Roman, but he had known the girl well enough. "Shit, I'm sorry, Jonas," he told him. "How are you dealing?" He asked, and reached out to touch the other's arm/hand (whatever was closer).

"Oh? I didn't know you and Elvira broke up," he commented, a little shocked. Yet, his shoulders visibly relaxed. "Thought she might have tagged along. Sorry to hear that." He wasn't sure if Roman was heartbroken about it or not, he didn't seem to be, but it could be that Vera's disappearance was more painful than a break up to him. Dimos was silently glad that the girl was out of the picture, though he would never tell Roman willingly. He could take being around Roman easier, when he was single—although he knew that at some point he'll have to get used to Roman being taken, it's wasn't fair to want his best friend to be alone forever just because he couldn't fall out of love with him.

He perked up, when Roman mentioned wanting to work at the reserve. "I can definitely ask around for a spot for you. I 'm at the moment also working at the Snowdonian Reserve in Wales, a temporary transfer, so I'm not around all the time, but I'm sure we'll be able to find something," he assured him, offering a grin.

Dimos’ hand resting on Roman’s forearm was comforting, and he nodded. “Yeah.” He said, after a moment. “I’ll be okay, but it’s hard too, as you can imagine. Everyone’s acting like she’s dead, but we haven’t found anything. She could be alive, or… more likely….” He didn’t want to say it, though. Turned. He knew her father would rather her be dead and turned, and that sounded horrible to say… but with what he knew of vampires, he wasn’t sure he disagreed. They were awful, and the freshly turned ones tended to be the most violent.

“Are you really super surprised about Elvira and I?” He asked, not certain if Dimos was surprised or if his best friend had noticed that things between them weren’t all perfect. “I mean, we’d been growing apart for awhile, not really… feeling it anymore, I guess. It was hard when we were struggling for rent, but her job is going pretty good now, so she can handle the apartment. I think Vera was more of an excuse for me to leave than I would have had otherwise but… we weren’t doing great.” He admitted. “I guess I never really felt ‘it’ for her, but I didn’t have anyone else to really focus on, so I tried. I wanted it to be her, I guess.” Roman let that linger between them for a few moments. He had trouble feeling real love for Elvira, despite them getting along well, in part because of Dimos. He remembered things between them fizzling, and always looked back at it when he thought of Elvira. He remembered how he felt when Dimos left for Nikon, and the parting with Elivra had not been nearly that painful.

“I appreciate you asking for me, and that’s awesome that you’re branching out and learning more, even. You told me about your cousin in Wales, I think. I was going to come up and visit you when you were over there, but then this happened first.” He admitted.  There was something hanging over his head, though. An elephant in the room with them. Roman didn’t really want to be the one to bring it up, but he did see the hickies on Dimos’ neck, and his stomach squirmed uncomfortably.

“Sooo…..” He started, glancing between Dimos’ hickies and his face. “You and Leskov, huh.” He said, after a moment. “Are you guys…..?” He let the question trail off rather than specifically asking. “I mean, I think it’s great that you might have a boyfriend or something, but I did not expect that.”

Dimos drew comforting circles over Roman's skin, where he was holding him. He would have probably hugged him by now, if he hadn't been sitting on the other side of the table. "Feel free to come around as much you want, if you need a breather, it can't be easy." He offered, nodding, knowing that dealing with being at home in that kind of atmosphere probably was not the easiest to deal with. "I wish I could say something more, that would help, but I feel like sometimes it's just not much you can say. It just is, and it sucks and I'm here for you whenever you need me, Jonas." He assured him, giving him a warm smile. He wanted to do more than that, be more than a comfort of a friend, but he had to be content with precisely just that, he knew.

Dimos cocked an eyebrow at Roman's question about Elvira and him. He was. He was, and perhaps he would have noticed more, but his own feelings held him back from observing Roman's relationship more than surface level, else it would hurt much more. It was unusual for Dimos to not know these things a little, he usually had a world of observations and advice on his plate for people, when they needed him—however, when his heart was on the line like this, he chose to protect himself first sometimes.

"Yeah." He admitted. "I'm sorry to hear that, man," he said, although he was bittersweet hearing he had wanted Elvira to be it. Part of him was happy that wasn't true, the other was just scared to even wonder who will it be in the future. He couldn't help the way his eyes dimmed a little, the words 'never really felt ‘it’ for her' replaying in his mind. "I get how you feel," he got out, somehow, although it felt like ash leaving his mouth, saying those words to the person who held his heart. He gave Roman a half-smile, not really able to muster up anything better and grasped at the opportunity to talk about something else with desperation.

"Ziko's a riot," he chuckled, thinking of his cousin fondly. Thinking about his family helped him immediately to feel lighter again. He loved them all so much. "He's from Uagadou, but from what I know he also spent some time at Castelbruxo both as a student and staff. He works for some kind of secret services which I have zero idea about, but he seems to like the job." He shrugged. "You two would get along I think." He added, smiling.

Dimos had wondered a little, briefly, if Roman would bring up Lev or not. He was aware that the shirt probably didn't hide everything, but part of him had hoped Roman would just pretend it didn't exist. He wasn't sure if he was ready to talk about this. He saw Roman glance at his neck, where his hickeys were, and knew that his wish was not happening. How was he supposed to explain a relationship that he himself have had a hard time figuring out for the longest time? He and Lev had extensively talked about how they felt respectively when Lev was living with him, but even between them they had a hard time putting it into words. Some things just transcended the limited options of what society offered, he supposed.

"Yeah, kind of," he answered, a little vague. "I mean, we aren't exactly dating." However, he wasn't so sure about this statement anymore after yesterday's night. They were exclusive for sure, they were both serious about what was between them, but they haven't exactly talked about if that means they are now officially dating, in a partnership and a major part of Dimos didn't care, really. The only reason he might care to know is to make it easier to explain to people around him. Otherwise, he was content. "We've talked about that and it's not of interest for either of us, but it's not just a fling either, so," he explained, not really going into detail too much. It was useless to try and disagree with something that was so obvious, even if he wasn't sure how to feel about talking on this regarding Lev and him, even if Lev had now became more open with people knowing about them, Dimos wasn't the most joyful telling Roman first out of everyone. Not to mentioned if it was complicated for Dimos to make sense of, how was he supposed to explain to Roman what this thing between him and Lev was? He wasn’t sure how much he wanted Roman to know either.

Lev knew how Dimos felt about Roman and so he knew, there would not be an issue in telling him. The issue was more on how much Dimos felt comfortable with Roman knowing. Would it make him feel terrible to tell Roman because he was also in love with him? Or would it help? "It's not exactly a new thing," he admitted, a bit reluctant. "Lev hadn’t been very comfortable with people knowing in the past, although he’s been better about it, plus he's still fucked up over Mihaela. I was relieved when he finally reached out and came to stay with me for a while, because...he was a mess." That was still putting it lightly. "They put him on probation in Quidditch for a while because he kept getting into fights and causing trouble, and while he was living here, we kind of restarted this." And now it had been a whole year since then. Wow.

Dimos was reluctant to talk about it, had always been reluctant to share things about his love life with Roman. It was one of the few areas of his life that Roman wasn't privy to very much. He's never asked much either, which sometimes Dimos found weird, but in the end was glad about. He'd always felt torn between telling his best friend everything he could and then juggle it with the fact it was also the man who was the love of his life (he was pretty sure about this now). "We aren't fifteen anymore though, so this time around we've talked shit through properly." Mostly, that is. He ran a hand over his curls, "laid things out on the table so that neither of us will get hurt again." It had been a relief telling someone about Roman—the best part about it being how easily Lev understood it. "I like taking care of him. Sex or not." He shrugged.

Ziko did, indeed sound interesting and Roman was thankful to have an excuse to stop talking about his ex, too. Things with Elvira had always been ‘okay’ but they had never really been perfect. In all truth, he had always had mediocre feelings in relationships, save one, and the one time he had a true fire in his heart, he had ended up burned. He couldn’t blame Dimos for it, though. From all Roman knew of his best friend’s relationships, none of them had been particularly serious. Dimos didn’t talk about his love life much, but the very fact that Dimos had not found anyone worth mentioning to Roman was enough for Roman to know nothing was too serious.

This was new, hearing about a lover, and he had only heard about him because he had stumbled upon them. He wasn’t sure how he felt about that. It seemed dishonest, in some ways, but also he had been gone and busy for a year…. So maybe they weren’t as close as they used to be. In some ways, it had been intentional distance. Roman had been very, very hurt by Dimos’ choices during their seventh year, and had not been able to be around him the same after that. At least not without time to heal, and he thought that maybe he had gotten that time. The healing, though, might have been lacking.

He had rushed into things with Elvira, and knew Dimos thought so, too. Still, he had needed something, someone, to fill the empty spaces. She was a band-aid, but she helped. He loved her, too, for that. Not ‘in love’ but platonic love. He wanted her to find a perfect partner, and he wished her nothing but the best. Lev, though, Roman had never favored. He thought him boisterous and arrogant and scrappy in a different way than he was. Roman had the ‘bad boy’ look and a devil-may-care attitude, but he did not have the meanness that Lev personified. What did Dimos really see in him? Was there a side that was left for lovers? He supposed that Lev had been nicer when he was with Mihaela. Roman did remember that much. Maybe he was kind to those he chose, but how Dimos could tolerate him being hateful to all others seemed out of character.

Of course, they weren’t dating. Roman might have been alarmed if they were. As it was, this tracked. Dimos wasn’t taking Lev that seriously, the same way he took no one else that seriously. The same way he had tossed Roman aside when he was done with him, Nikon, and probably others. Lev wouldn’t be there forever, if Dimos wouldn’t commit to him. Roman wasn’t worried, but he didn’t like it.

“I guess?” He replied, after a moment. “You always did have a way of finding misfits and taking care of them. Like baby dragons breathing fire.” He teased. “But I see you still aren’t settling down. That’s good for you, man. Live while you’re young.”

Of course, Roman wouldn't know that Dimos has had a plethora of serious (even if sometimes short-lived) relationship, he had just refrained from talking to the object of his love about it. Similarly, Dimos had no idea what kinds of conclusions had Roman come to about his love life. Consciously he wasn't very worried or bothered about finding that out, he wasn't curious at all, he wanted to keep those two parts of his life apart now more than ever, especially after this period with Elvira.

In some ways, Roman getting into a relationship and then moving in with his girlfriend (which really had been some of what Dimos felt most iffy about), it had made him more cautious and reserved towards his best friend, regarding his love life even more. At least that's what he felt like. He felt less inclined to tell Roman about things from his life, even if there still was a part of him who wanted to do so. He felt even less inclined to talk about what he does in the bedroom than ever before, and he counted that as a positive change. Plus, their year apart had given another amazing thing which had come from the mess, and that was Lev. For Dimos it meant he now actually had someone to focus on (had been focused on) and it brought him a rush of relief to finally feel like he can settle. It was a comforting thought.

He couldn't help the smile that slipped onto his lips, thinking of Lev sleeping in his bed, and stuffed his face with some more eggs before he started to feel too conscious of it with Roman in front of him.

He smiled again at Roman's comment at finding misfits and taking care of them. "I suppose I'll always be the big brother kinda guy. Always the favourite one. The baby dragons love me, even when they try to chew on my fingers." He chuckled. He kind of wanted to see his lover's expression to that. He opened his mouth to comment further, but then paused as Roman said something else, something about still not settling down and living while he's young. Well, that was a particularly bittersweet a pill coming from Roman. Where had he even gotten that idea from?

Perhaps his limited information sharing led his best friend to assuming things. Dimos wasn't sure how to feel about that. However, it gave him a leeway too. It got him out of the sharing part without having to find an excuse as to why he didn't want to talk about it in detail with Roman (unless Roman pushed). There was a smaller part of him that wanted to declare it was serious between him and Lev, which it was, and make it a point to shove it in the other's face. However, he knew that was the part of him still bruised over his relationship with Elvira. The part of him that wanted to act petty as fuck sometimes.

He sighed and chose not to comment on that, stuffing his mouth again instead. He did let that pettiness at Roman's words seep through his silence, and he locked his eyes with his best friend for a moment before focusing back on his food. Take it how you will, Jonas. He thought, a little grumpy, in his head. He really hadn't gotten much sleep at all. Absentmindedly, he reached and thumbed against one of the particlarly vivasciously vibrant hickeys. He had missed Roman like crazy but for some reason in that moment he longed to be back in bed with Lev, tangled like two octopuses again.

There was definitely a part of Roman projecting on Dimos–his relationship whirlwind with his ex had been too much too soon. A lot of Elvira had come from Dimos ending their situationship abruptly, and Roman feeling neglected by his best friend, but he took responsibility for the decision. He had thought he loved her, at some point, but had really just loved the stability of a relationship. Living with her had not been the best choice, but it had uprooted him from his family and put him out on his own, which was a good thing too. There were some decent things about the move and the relationship, but that didn’t mean it had been a good choice even so. Now, back at his parents’ home and missing Dimos more than ever, Roman was giving the other the advice that he had needed to hear himself. He didn’t know anything about Lev and Dimos’ relationship, but he knew he had settled too soon and didn’t want to see Dimos follow him down that path. He felt like explaining this, but also was afraid to poke the bear too much. If he explained that Elvira was an escape, Dimos would want to know what he was escaping from, and that meant talking about things between them and Roman’s uncertain feelings about their ‘experimenting.’

Roman and Dimos had never been together romantically, and Roman knew that–but he also knew he never felt more loved than he had in their interactions. He wanted more of that, and hadn’t wanted it to end. Dimos didn’t seem as invested in it as he was, though, and that frightened Roman. He had hoped that their experiment would turn into a relationship eventually, but had been happy going slow. Dimos didn’t seem to want the same thing, and had shown that to Roman. It wasn’t Dimos’ fault that Roman felt somehow both vulnerable and unseen. He hadn’t tried too hard to keep things, because he felt so vulnerable. He wanted Dimos to see that it had began to mean something to him, but that hadn’t happened.

There was a part of Roman who was already jealous of Lev. He knew he and Dimos had been very close in school. He even thought Dimos might have had a crush on him at some point, when Lev got with Mihaela–Dimos tried to hide it, but had been almost inconsolable. Roman noticed, but like many things, he chose not to mention it and distract Dimos as best as he could, instead. He had never considered, even for a moment, that Lev would return those feelings. He knew Lev was a homophobe–he was vocal about it. Maybe he was just vocal because he secretly liked and wanted it. Roman assumed that was the case, in retrospect.

He couldn’t help notice the hickeys, and they made him a little uncomfortable. He had once given the other hickies like that. Dimos was getting them from Lev now, apparently. He sighed, audibly, and started in on his food. He didn’t much know what to say. “Hey, if I’m intruding, you’d tell me, right?” He asked, carefully. There was a lot of distance between them, a lot of unsaid hurt on both sides, and even Roman knew that–even if he didn’t know the extent of it. He had really neglected Dimos in recent months and had popped up suddenly like nothing had happened. He just….wanted things to go back to normal, and that included their friendship. He wanted to go back to the before times.

“You think we might wake him up, or?”

For Dimos, their situationship had been a struggle for him from the start because of how he felt for Roman. It was both a dream and a nightmare. Having the chance to be intimate with Roman was an amazing experience, but knowing how deep he was for his best friend who had just started exploring that side of him, he knew that emotionally the relationship had not been equal. Which was why he had decided to try and distract himself, and it ended up being through Nikon. Somehow he had thought that having his focus in more than one direction for once would help release what he was carrying and he'd feel less scared and vulnerable about 'what ifs'. It worked only partially, and despite being sad about it, part of him had been relieved when they stopped sleeping together, regardless how much he missed it.

Roman had never actually been very vocal about wanting anything more, and for that reason Dimos never got the feeling like it was anything more for his best friend. That point was driven further in a way, when Roman got himself a girlfriend so quick. He missed their intimacy, but he missed his best friend all the more even without that. A year was a long time. Dimos wasn't sure what he would have done, if Lev hadn't been around, because their relationship took up a lot of Dimos' time he would have otherwise spent agonising over Roman and the absence of him. That did not mean it had not hurt.

The distance right now also hurt, but it was something Dimos accepted as inevitable after a year. There was a part of him that enjoyed the change, because he felt like it gave him some breathing room. However, the majority of his being, the in love with his best friend part, wanted to be as close as possible. "I'd tell you, you're not." He told him. "You just can't expect things to be the same as a year ago when you've made little effort to come see me," he was straightforward, like always, even if the topic might be uncomfortable. "I missed you, Jonas, but I'm also angry with you." What was the point in lying about it?

"The letters were nice, but hardly enough, and this is not how I deserve to be treated by my best friend." He told him, point blank, eyes a little sad as he gazed at the man he loved so dearly. A sigh left lips and he reached for a glass of water to take a sip and to have something to do with his hands. "If he wakes up, it will be on his own, I cast a spell to lower our volume, so us talking shouldn't be that loud. He'll come out eventually, probably soon," he shrugged, but a small smile came back to his face.

Roman didn’t like this, the tense silence. He didn’t know how to break it, though, so even though Dimos’ words went right to his gut, he was happier to know what the issue was than just wonder in silence. He looked away, bit his lip. “I know.” he said, after a moment. “It was hard for me, too, but…” He sighed. “Look at you. You’ve found someone, right?” He sidelined the subject. “Sorry if I was harsh earlier, I just.. Fuck. Running away with a girl I’d dated for like two months seemed like a good idea at the time, but it really wasn’t. I wasn’t running away with her. I was just running.” He admitted, but he didn’t go much deeper than that.

“But…. I’m here now. I learned my lesson.” He assured, though he wasn’t sure he learned much at all. It just hurt. “I just… wanted a fresh start somewhere and I was having a graduation crisis, or something.” He sighed. He flicked his eyes back over to Dimos, braving it. “I didn’t mean to hurt you so much. I guess I didn’t know you’d be so bothered.” That was a little more bitter than he meant for it to sound, but he already said it–there was no going back.

He heard some shifting in the bedroom nearby, and sighed. So much for talking it out, he guessed. “I just hope things can go back to how they were.” He admitted. “I’m willing to work for it if you are, but… fuck, for all I know you’re settled into your new life and I’m intruding. Not necessarily in your house, but in your life.”

Lev couldn’t hear every in and out of the conversation, but he heard enough to know it was time to get up. He hadn’t been jolted awake by talking, but when he noticed Dimos wasn’t in bed he wondered for a moment where his lover had gone. That was when he recognized a voice he hadn’t heard in a long time. No way…

For a brief moment, Lev found himself panicking. He knew Dimos loved Roman. Dimos had never lied about it, never kept that from him. It was very well known between them…. But until now, this had no impact on their relationship whatsoever, and Lev had gotten extremely comfortable with Dimos, especially since they had their conversation in Spain. Now, though, it was all on his head. He knew Dimos was upset with Roman, hurt mostly, but he knew Dimos still loved him. He would forgive him. What did Roman want? Would he steal Dimos away from him, now that Lev was finally happy? Would he do it on purpose? Lev knew that was selfish to think, but he worried. Dimos probably would be over the moon if Roman ‘stole’ him from Lev, and Lev should have been happier at the prospect, but instead he was scared.

He listened carefully for a few moments, struggling to make out everything, but eventually realized that he would need to get up and face it. He put pants on, no shirt, and left the bedroom.

“Sup.” He said to them, mostly Roman, before he went over to Dimos. He was worried the other wouldn’t want him there, and that hurt his feelings preemptively. Dimos wasn’t heartless and Dimos loved him. He needed to remember that, and trust the other man. He was just so scared of losing this.

“You okay?” He asked Dimos, flicking his eyes up to meet the other’s. A silent question of ‘am i okay to be here right now’ telepathically connecting with the other. He felt small, scared, and unsure. Would Dimos even want to acknowledge him as a lover in front of Roman?

Dimos’ eyes were for a second attracted to Roman’s mouth, when the man looked away and bit at his lip. The gaze was quick, however, and Dimos did not make it obvious. He had done it so many times without Roman noticing, although after a year it felt somehow new too. Being around Roman sometimes made him feel like he was fourteen again, instead of his current age, when he used to be more hormonal and prone to needing some physical relief from what plagued his mind about Roman. In a way, it felt like the distance might have brought it back a little, like time turned back. It was weird.

He blinked, when Roman spoke and tried to focus in on his words, pushing anything else away. Hearing Roman say he was running made Dimos wonder why, but he did not ask. He didn’t feel like they were patched up enough for them to bare their souls with deep topics to each other again just yet. It did not change he was upset about Roman avoiding watering their friendship with the proper care it deserved. Yeah, they were childhood friends, but that didn’t mean it did not require tender care to keep that bond as strong and close as it used to be when they were kids. In many ways it got harder, because with emotional maturity, harder topics to talk about came to light—and Roman tended to have a harder time with them than Dimos, who was used to talking about hard things within a big family already. The only thing he liked to keep tight-lipped on was his love life, because he deserved the privacy one could have a lack of with so many siblings.

“Fresh start, huh.” He commented. The ‘without me’ wasn’t verbalised, but it hung there, unsaid, clear as day. He wasn’t so sure what to say, when Roman poked the bear, saying he didn’t know he’d be so bothered. Of course he was. The man he was head over heels for saw it fit to leave and not see him for a fucking year—but he’d be pissed even if he was not romantically interested in Roman. The difference was that with everything with Nikon, Rodion and Lev happening in his life recently, he’s been learning to put his foot down regarding his own feelings a little more. He knew he had the tendency to serve to his own detriment, but he’s been working on it in the love life department at least, and it showed, it seemed. “Why would I not be bothered?” He questioned, frowning a little. Bothered was such a weak word, Roman had no idea how he had been at the start. “I’ve simmered down, Jonas. I was livid, raving mad, the first few months, even though I didn’t show it in the letters. I’m much calmer now.” He told him, pointedly. Bothered could not begin to cover it. He wasn’t trying to hurt Roman, he just wanted to make it clear that was not it at all for him.

He heard movement from the other room much as Roman, and part of him was glad for the timing. Having Lev there would make things easier for his heart. He met Roman’s gaze. “There’s a place in my life for you, Jonas. Even after a year, even if you decided to fuck off for ten years. There’s a place in my life that’s just yours, and always will be. Though if you want to be anything like before you’re going to have to work for it a little.” He told him, straight and honest. He wasn’t sure if he was as irreplaceable for his best friend as he was for him, but did not dwell on the thought. He did not need to torture himself in such ways.

Dimos wondered for a brief moment, when Lev came out, how much he had heard. He’s told Lev all about Roman, of course, but it was different hearing about it, and having the man in the flesh in their lives now. Your timing is immaculate, Jonas. He thought, sarcastic. Although, despite the anger he was actually happy to see him again.

Lev was shirtless, only in pants, which left the hickeys on his body stark, bared to the world as well. There were a few around his throat, but much more around his waistband, which had Dimos’ ears a little hot, raving his eyes over them. The petty part of him liked Roman seeing this, even though there was not much point to it, since his love was one-sided, it made him feel better.

Dimos certainly did want to acknowledge Lev as a lover in front of Roman. He already did, verbally, and just like with the marks, there was a small part of him gleeful at the idea of shoving it in his best friend's face, despite everything. As Lev walked towards him, Dimos slid his arm around his waist when he could, pulling him closer. He noticed something in Lev’s face, something that wasn’t completely right—Lev had a harder time keeping his emotions inside when it came to him, he noticed. Was he worried about Roman? Why?

Before he replied to Lev’s question, wanting to make sure everything was okay, he pulled Lev down to kiss him, his lips gentle and inquisitive, cupping his cheek in a firm grip. He let the kiss linger, not in a hurry to part. “I’m good. How are you feeling?” He murmured softly, pulling back, eyes curious, the double meaning there. “I prepared some potions for you for the head and any pain, if you need.” He told him, voice a little lower, although Roman could probably still hear everything considering the small distance.

Roman really hadn’t considered that Dimos would notice, or care, that he had left. The part of him that had wanted and hoped Dimos would miss him was very aware of the anger in the other;s voice when he talked about it. Leaving had hurt Dimos, and, for a moment–Roman liked that. He knew it was wrong, selfish, and immature… but Roman had left because he hadn’t felt appreciated, and knowing he was missed made him think Dimos had discovered something was missing.

He didn’t really have a chance to verbally reply, though, before Lev made his way out. Roman caught the look on his face as he looked at Dimos, probably worried about “coming out” to him, and what Dimos was going to–or had already–said. Dimos pulled Lev close and kissed him, Roman had to look away. This was what he didn’t want to see, what he hadn’t wanted to come back to.

Roman bit his lip. “Do you think I should head out, then?” He wondered. He had only just gotten there, but he felt like he was intruding.

Lev was relieved when Dimos pulled him in for a kiss. He kissed back, Roman be damned, and looked up at Dimos with so much love in his eyes. He cared for this man, more than anyone. He loved DImos, as hard as it had been to admit. Lev went to find the potions, took one, and came back right as Roman started to stand up. “You don’t have to leave on my account. You just got here, didn’t you?” He asked. He didn’t know what Roman’s deal was. He had just come back after a year away, and now was trying to barge out over… what? Seeing Dimos kiss him? What was his problem?

Lev knew how Dimos felt about Roman, but he, himself, could never understand it. He didn’t like Roman much. He thought he was immature and a little aloof. Maybe that was something Dimos found charming?