[thd] out of excuses • • c l e m

Freya's tongue was bigger than usual.

Freya had just eaten a ton-tongue toffee and now her tongue was swollen, down an inch past her chin. She giggled a little as she poked it with the tip of her wand. the sensation was so weird and must look absolutely ridiculous, she thought. Freya found it pretty funny though. It wasn't as if she - like Janne had that one time - had taken it by mistake. That might have her panicking and freaking out just like her little cousin had done.

Okay, so perhaps eating weird sweets and laughing about the effects was a little juvenile but Freya would never turn down sweets. After the incident with the belching toad punch, Freya and Clementine had gone back to the store and bought a whole bunch of weird things to try. Then they'd put them all in a brown paper bag and now they were taking turns eating them. It wasn't exactly getting a drink, but Freya was enjoying herself and Clem seemed to be too, so what was the harm?

Even with her fat tongue, Freya managed to perform a spell on herself to counteract the side effects of the ingredients that magically transformed her tongue into some weird floppy tentacle. It didn't take long for her tongue to return to its normal size, though it did feel a little painful afterward. Massaging her jaw, Freya gave her younger friend a smile. "Never liked those ones," she said.

"Me either," Clementine agreed with her friend, sucker in her mouth clacking loudly on her teeth as she moved it over to be able to speak, and wrinkled her nose. She knew that someone a long time ago -- maybe it had been Neville Longbottom -- had gotten one of these blood pops and hadn't known it was made with legitimate blood. It was sort of gross. She didn't mind the taste, though, if she was being totally honest. It was sort of just iron-y and salty. There were much worse tastes. Such could be found in every bag of Bertie Bott's, unless you were unrealistically lucky, and she'd never met anyone who hadn't gotten an earwax or vomit bean in their bag.

She giggled quite a bit at the sounds Freya was making trying to do the spell. It was almost as unfortunate to watch as it had been when they'd been belching more air than was physically possible. A little traumatized, Clementine didn't believe she'd be drinking any toad punch anytime soon. It had been not at all short of awful.

"These blood pops, though," She mused, scratching her chin as if she had facial hair there, "They're not bad. Does that make me weird?" The blonde leaned over the table and made a face, suddenly very interested as to why she didn't mind them. "Maybe I have a blood kink I don't know about yet." This was unlikely, of course, but she knew it was likely to get a laugh out of her friend. She liked making people laugh and entertaining them.

"What else we got? You have any liquor? Don't have to go out all the time to have fun."

"Yes," Freya said, nodding, "definitely." She snorted at Clementine's next comment. The younger girl was funny, she thought. If they'd been in the same year at school Freya genuinely believed that they would have been close friends. Freya liked both of the Russell sisters, really. The blonde's eyes were drawn to a little bit of red liquid that sat in the corner of Clem's lips. Blood pops, huh? Freya couldn't say that she enjoyed them. The blonde had tried one as a dare one time, but the taste of blood had made her feel a little bit sick.

"Not just like, on me," Freya said, laughing in a light, melodic way. Freya wasn't in the habit of just carrying around bottles of vodka or whatever. It didn't really help that she didn't like the taste of alcohol, she thought. Especially the kinds of drinks that most people had in a casual, social setting, like beer or wine. Both of those liquids were gross to Freya; she'd rather have a glass of water, honestly. When Freya was out she usually drank cocktails or easy mixes of things, like apple juice and vodka.

The alumni took another sweet from the bag and popped it into her mouth. "Oh," she said, wrinkling her nose a little before jets of hot steam blew out both of her ears. The strong smell and taste of eucalyptus burst through her sinuses. Freya didn't like the flavour at all.

"Oh. Yeah, fair." Clementine nodded at her. She didn't want to think about why it was weird that Freya didn't just carry a flask around with her. Clementine was pretty sure she had one buried in her bag somewhere, but it was probably empty. She needed to ask Dennis to buy some more for her the next time they went out. She needed to stop thinking about it, too. Or about him. Or both. It wasn't so bad to be thinking about him, though, was it? Unless he wasn't thinking about her. Then maybe it was bad. The blonde finished the sucker and licked her lips, catching sight of how brownish-red her tongue was. Ew. That was actually moderately disgusting, and she was through rehashing the image in her mind, so she was going to drink some water.

She pulled a bottle of it out of her backpack and took a few swigs, laughing at Freya when smoke blew out of her ears. "It's like an essential oil bomb. Do you want some of this?" She shook the bottle at her and slid it across the table to her, sifting through the brown paper bag to decide which weird sweet to eat next. "These are supposed to be like... gushing candy," Clem muttered to Freya as she read the label, which wasn't as descriptive as she'd have liked. At least she was reading labels now.

The Gryffindor supposed it was supposed to be a mysterious, daring sort of activity anyway, so she popped one into her mouth and hummed pleasantly at the taste. "It tastes like I've just eaten a real cherry," She said impolitely, voice muffled by the food in her mouth. "Here, try one. Tell me which one you get. They're like... Bertie Bott's but with good food. I think, anyway."

"Thanks," Freya said, taking the water and having a quick gulp. It didn't really wash away the eucalyptus flavour but it was a temporary relief at least. She could think of thirty nine different flavours off of the top of her head that she'd rather be tasting right now. The blonde shifted in her place on the bench, adjusting her ponytail a little as she watched Clementine pick out the next snack. By now, Freya felt a little bit sick. Feeling a bit sick had never stopped her before, though. The blonde girl was the kind of person who always tried to finish all the food on her plate, even if she was already full. She didn't really know why. Habit, she supposed.

Freya wrinkled her nose at the mention of Bertie Bott's every flavour beans. The pair had bought a packet today and dropped a handful into the big brown paper bag they were now drawing things from, but naturally those particular sweets had stayed at the bottom. Last time Freya had had some she'd had two in a row that were grass flavoured. It seemed so unlikely, but it had happened. Just her luck, she thought. Raising her eyebrows a little, Freya held out a hand to try a couple of the sweets Clem was having now. She popped a blue one into her mouth. Freya swished it around in her mouth a little. "Oh," she said, her tongue turning blue slowly. "It's tingly." The blonde couldn't really place the flavour, but it was fruity. Or... it was that sort of lolly-fruit flavour that was way too sugary but still great.

By now, she must have eaten about thirty-nine pieces of candy. Way too many. She was going to be working this off on the pitch and around the lake for days. And days. And days. It was unfair how easy it was to consume calories versus how difficult it was to burn them off. Perhaps there would be some sort of advancement in food that made it so there weren't calories in any junk food. That would be nice, now, wouldn't it?

Clementine dove her hand into the bag to look for her last piece of candy. This would be it. She'd stop after this, and control herself to the extent she knew how. That wasn't much, but she wasn't looking to throw up a bunch of candy. "This one is just... exploding.... something." She squinted hard to try to read the packaging and was unsuccessful. Her fingers gripped both ends of the wrapper and twisted, and while she turned the newly-revealed candy that looked almost like a capsule over in her hands, it seemed to expand. And expand. And.... expand --

Pop. Shriek.

"Oh my god, no!" Clementine lamented while she wiped the potatoes off her eyes, her heart sufficiently broken. "This is one of those meal things you're supposed to open and then swallow immediately to feel full. Somehow they've compacted mashed potatoes in this one," She explained to Freya, looking over at her friend who was equally covered in creamy-white mounds of potato. Clementine scraped some off Freya's glasses with her finger and tasted it. "Not bad, though." It didn't take long for her to be over the dirty clothes and laugh at the pickle they'd gotten themselves into.

"I think this is the most traumatic Honeydukes trip I've ever had." That much was true. "Let's go get all this off?"